Average nap lengths for 7 mo

[Mandy.kamal]

Sorry I missed your post somehow! Thank you for all of your support.
My goal now is to get him to sleep anytime I can and for as long as I can!!
I have no EASY routine at the moment and just desperately trying to stop all the meltdowns and 30 min naps...

I'm waiting for that morning when he wakes up happy and alert and rested and ill do my best not to screw things up again!!! I honestly have NO clue what his proper A time is now...ugh.

And 'boo' is right....try and enjoy that only nap as long as you can before its gone for good

[Emami]

Hi Mandy, I saw your post on lovelylily's thread about your DS napping 30mins, awake 30mins and going back to sleep 30mins.  My DD used to do the same thing, not during the 3-2 but when she was first learning to sleep independently and transition through cycles.  I didn't really think about it being OT or UT since she was in her bed the whole time and sleeping for most of it I just counted it as a nap and the bit in the middle was just time she needed to figure it out.  Maybe that's what your DS is doing?  Things have been wonky and he might be re-figuring out when and how long he needs to sleep.

[Mandy.kamal]

Thank you Emma!
It's the strangest thing. He was waking in between and screaming but now he's waking and lightly fussing only, then back to sleep for anther 30.

I can literally set my clock to it. He sometimes wakes happy and others still crying but he never can go back to sleep after the second wake up.

I hope youre right and it is just a little phase with relearning everything since it got so messy. I'm hoping now that he's not waking and screaming in the middle, that he's on the path to extending it without the wake up??

I just still have no clue what A times should be for him since it all got crazy and these weird naps aren't helping me know if he needs an A push or what.

I guess ill keep going with the flow and follow his cues the best I can and hope we will see progress soon! Thanks for letting me know that yours did the same thing! 

I've been only doing the CN if he seems to truly need it so hopefully I can drop it completely soon and maybe that'll help him figure out his day sleep a bit more?

I really appreciate your reply! I hope your family is doing well

[Mandy.kamal]

I have another question...
I'm still trying to get DS to fully overcome this OT nightmare and we have had no set WU or BT in well over a month.
Is that messing with DS at all? I've thrown the routine out the window only to follow his cues and get him caught up on sleep but I'm ready to start getting back to a more 'set' and predictable EASY.

His WU and BT is anywhere between 5:30-7:30, for both. This morning he woke at 5:00am (after going to bed at 6:30pm the night before) but was very fussy and he was trying to go back to sleep from the moment he woke up....the only issue is that it took him until just before 7:00am to finally fall back to sleep...

I let him because I could tell he was not ready to wake and want him to get all the sleep he can. Is me doing this making it harder for him to adjust because he (like I) have no clue when morning, all naps, and bedtime are??

[Mandy.kamal]

He woke at 7:45am really upset so I quickly fed him and got him up for the morning. We played very low key and went for a long walk. He started getting fussy around 9:00am so I got him ready for a nap and just put him down at 9:15. He was tossing around trying to go to sleep but I honestly have no clue if he's even tired or not.....

I had NO idea when first nap should be since he woke at 5:00am, resettled around 7:00, then up at 7:45. I don't know when 'wake' time started.

I'm trying my best to relax but this is really wearing me down. I have lost complete control of the situation.

Update- he wasn't tired...just cooing and playing in crib. I got him up and I guess ill wait a but liner and see... 

[Emami]

Do you feel like he's caught up at all since you've been away from a routine?  The point of doing that was really to get him better rested and then shoot for the 2 good naps again right?  So maybe it's time to try and get a new routine going.  Since you're not sure of a good A time for him right now I would pick an average for his age, say 3hrs and work off that.  Just stick with it and see what it gets you.

As for waking him to get a consistent WU time - that's up to you.  Personally I hate to wake a sleeping baby!  I've usually left DD to it unless her sleeping longer / later makes it too hard to fit everything in and it pushes BT too late.  I never used to wake her when she was getting used to a new routine, ie. 3-2 and 2-1 because adjusting to those transitions can cause OT anyway.  So in your case I probably would leave him.  Hth

[Mandy.kamal]

Thank you. I'm going to start that tomorrow. Today is by far the worst it has been. He has been screaming when I put him down for naps, taking an hour to settle, waking after 30, screaming and not going back to sleep. I tried for over an hour to get him down for nap 2 and he screamed until he passed out but woke before 30 mins...screaming. Still is now- I has to walk away for just a bit. Me being in there doesn't even help him.

I am visiting with my dad now and was planning on staying until Sunday, but looks like ill be going home tomorrow since this isn't a very 'fun' visit. Ill start the set A time as soon as I return home.

What's your advice on the awkward am WU? When do I say WU is when he wakes between 4:00-5:00am and then resettles after an hour or so then back to sleep? Do I just do 3 hours A from the final WU time?

I can't get over how he's acting...I don't even feel like this is my same child at the moment...

[LovelyLilyandJack]

If jack wakes at 5-6am and then resettle (normally only for 45 minutes until 7.30/7.45) I treat it as a night feed and the later wake up time as the start of his day.  It seems to work ok for us.  He generally doesn't resettle if he's already had close to 12 hours sleep by 6ish anyway so he sort of regulates it himself. Having a nice short day the next day sometimes helps too!

[Emami]

I would pick a time, say 6am as an ok time to start the day, and treat anything earlier than that as a NW.  So if you get that WU at 4 and then he sleeps 5:30-7ish I would count 7 as the start of the day. So yes, 3hrs from the final WU time.

Do you feel like the screaming is routine related, ie. he is protesting sleep whether UT or OT, or is there anything else going on?  Do you think he's teething or uncomfortable?  How is he in general?

Posted with LL - looks like we agree about nights

[Mandy.kamal]

Do you always feed him at that 5:00 ish wake up?

[Mandy.kamal]

So if he hasn't resettled by 6:00am, even if he seems tired and trying to fall back to sleep still, just get him up? Or always just let him sleep until he wakes and clearly wants to start the day? Sorry...I just want to clarify so I don't screw up again.

He's most definitely screaming from being OT or UT but he always cries horrible when he's super OT. It's just been months and months since its been this bad with all the crying.

I've tried medication but that doesn't seem to help during the day. I am goin to take him to the doctor when I get home just to make sure... He has bad reflux but medication didn't help so there's no telling if that's it or not either.

Maybe seperation anxiety?? My gut just thinks OT...

[Emami]

So if he hasn't resettled by 6:00am, even if he seems tired and trying to fall back to sleep still, just still get him up?

No, I just mean don't get him up BEFORE 6am (or whatever time you feel is acceptable to start the day).  By all means let him sleep if he will.  Btw, this is just my opinion.  I know there are plenty of people who find it helpful to start the day at a consistent time, but when my DD was that age her day could vary by an hour or so and it was never a problem.  The routine was consistent more than the times iykwim?

If he has reflux that hasn't been helped by medication maybe the doctor can try a different med?  That seems odd to me that it's basically been left untreated?  That could have a lot to do with his bad sleep and crying

[Mandy.kamal]

Our GI doctor basically said that some babies don't respond well to meds and he doesn't think they help DS since he didn't show much improvement on them and he said he'd grow out of it. My pediatrician referred me to him so he doesn't help much either. I may go see another doctor just to get another opinion??

He's much better during the nights the naps so I'm thinking if it were the reflux then it'd be effecting night sleep as well, right?

Thanks for clearing that up for me about the wake up time!

One more question and ill leave you alone I promise! If I'm going to start with 3 hours A to stick with for a few days and see what happens, would I use 3 hours A across the board or would I still lessen the A after a short nap?

Thank you so much....I need to send you flowers and candy!!!

[Emami]

Lol thanks, I just wish you were getting some better naps!

Wrt 3hrs A time...hmm... usually I would say pull back the A after a short nap to avoid OT.  But you've already got OT going on and not much has improved so tbh I'd be tempted to push it anyway and hope that at some point he's going to crash and pull a long catch up nap.  And he does need to get used to longer A times to be able to do 2 naps.

I have no experience with reflux so I'll see if I can get some more eyes on that for you.  It just doesn't seem like the best plan to me to wait until he grows out of it.  How does the doctor know how uncomfortable he is in the meantime yk?

[LovelyLilyandJack]

Mandy - in answer to your question about feeding at 5am I do cos he only ever wakes around then if it's been at least 4 hours since his last feed.  Most of the time I think allowing him to go back to sleep is more important than his feeds cos I can always work them around the day iykwim?  I was/am worried it is setting up a bad habit but he only wakes between 5 and 6 if he's had an early night feed and sleeps past 6 just as often so I think it's ok. There's been the odd time I've fed him when I'm not sure if he really needs it but seeing as we're still feeding at night anyway and I haven't made any effort to wean it yet I'm not too worried about it.