LO has to scream himself to sleep

[Atomic1010]

Ok well since I last posted things settled down and we carried on having about three wake ups a night and on the odd occasion two, which was great! However, since Monday night things have all gone pear shaped. He is impossible to settle at bedtime now, and the shh pat thing I was doing just doesn't seem to be working anymore. When I try it he either grabs my hand and starts playing with it or tries to turn towards me, and he gets more upset than calmed down.the first nap of the day is also a screamathon now and I have been taking him out of the cot and bringing him downstairs for a bit before trying again and the second time is easier.

Anyway the last two bedtimes I have breastfed him to sleep. Wednesday night because he was hysterical and nothing was working, and tonight because my other half is away, I have a 2 year old to get ready for bed and LO was crying for 45 mins and again nothing was working.  The last two nights have also been rubbish. He has been awake once or twice each night for an hour and a half chatting for a bit and then when he gets tired he gets really upset and can't be settled so again I've had to bf him to sleep then.

Why is nothing working anymore? I'm wondering whether this is tooth no 2 on its way? What do I do as I am really worried this bf to sleep is creating another prop when I had tried so hard to eliminate all props :-( giving him nurofen before bedtime doesn't seem to be making a difference.

[Atomic1010]

Bump

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

What is your lo's routine like now? He is around 6 months right? Another prime time for a growth spurt and needing routine tweaks I am afraid. He fact that he is having chatting nw and that the first nap has been refused until he has more A times makes me wonder if he is ut.

[jessmum46]

Yes I was wondering similarly, can you post the routine for us to look at?  We had to jump A times rapidly at 5-6 months and were fully on 2 naps by the 6 month mark x

[Atomic1010]

Hi thanks for your help.  Yes he turned 6mths last week.

Awake:  6.30
Tried to put him down after 2hr 10 but didn't work
Tried again at 2hr 45 and he got very upset as I think OT by that point so ended up bf to sleep, which took minutes, as shh thing and singing didn't work. Fell asleep 9.30.

Slept until 11am

Next sleep was from 1.30-2.30 he woke upset with wind and was a nightmare until
4.30 when he went to sleep again for 30 mins and woke up out of sorts again.

He wakes 3 times a night still and lately there's been a spell when he is just awake for 1-2 hrs.

Generally he naps 3 times a day with an A time of 2hr 15. He usually has a 30 min nap early morning and late afternoon with a longer snooze at lunch.  My issue is he isn't settling well anymore and the old shh thing isn't working. Perhaps it's not age appropriate anymore? Can try increasing the A time although this is somewhat dictated by how long he takes to settle.

[Atomic1010]

Ps i take him to bed when I see him yawn/rub eyes/fuss rather than taking him up after a set time. Sometimes despite all the eye rubbing etc he just can't settle :-(

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

These are average A times based on age: Average A times- BOOKMARK ME!

I would definitely think he is ut and needs to switch to 2 naps with long nw like that. I wouldn't necessarily take the eye rubbing etc as honest to goodness tired cues at this age - for one they can kind of "learn" to be tired at certain times and sometimes the "tired" signs can actually be something else - like boredom. 2 hrs A time is closer to a 4 month olds routine (just talking generalities here - of course babies fall lower or higher in sleep needs and might not fit that).

What time is his bedtime?

[Atomic1010]

Thanks for your help  His bedtime is 6.30 - 7. I tried increasing his A time a little yesterday but it didn't seem to make any difference, certainly not to the night.

[MasynSpencerElliotte]

How much did you increase it by? Enough to not have 3 naps? It may take some time and it may not solve the nw right away. Does he have feeds at night? Trying to wrack my brain for what my older kids routine at 6 months was like!

[Atomic1010]

Hi I increased it by half an hour which he seemed ok with but it didn't make a difference to the nw or the number of naps. He just isn't ready for two naps at the moment. He still feeds at night - 3 times, so I have been trying to get him on more solids during the day so he isn't looking to me for calories at night. He still isn't settling well at naps and I'm bf him to sleep if he can't settle despite his own efforts. It might be making a rod for my own back and both my OH and mum have criticised me for it but I am sure he is teething and is in discomfort despite having ibuprofen. I know it's not great but after 20 mins of him crying when trying to settle and nothing else working it just feels the right thing to do to comfort him and help him sleep.

[jessmum46]

One day won't fix things. I would consistently stick to a longer A time for at least a week and try to keep 3rd nap to a minimum, if at all.  If you can get anywhere near a reasonable WU time from second nap I'd do an EBT instead - I used to say 3pm or later then I'd do an EBT 3h after WU

[Atomic1010]

An A time of 3 hours is just too much for him at the moment particularly as he is having increased NW. However, he is now comfortably doing an A time of 2hr 30 with a 30 min nap in the morning and two longer naps at lunchtime and mid afternoon. Generally he is settling fine for naps although I am having to bf him to sleep on at least one nap every couple of days as he is very upset and can't settle. he is definitely tired when I take him up.

The nights are a disaster though as we seem to be going backwards. He is waking every two hours and it's been going on for a couple of weeks. I have tried to stick to my feeding him every three hours but on occasion I have just bf him to sleep as I am so tired and I can't settle him. Sometimes he cries  in his sleep.

Here is last night...

Bedtime at 7pm, awake at 9.45 (feed), 12 but got himself back to sleep, 1 - 2.30 awake but settled himself with some singing and patting, 5 awake (feed), then 6.30 awake for day.

I am putting all this down to teething although why nurofen makes no difference I don't know, but I am feeling so fed up with the nights getting worse and the fact it's been going on for weeks. If it isn't teething I have no idea what the problem is or what to do 

[jessmum46]

I think you are in a vicious cycle really, he's not sleeping well at night because A times are too short and he's having too many naps.  But then because he has bad nights he is willing to go down after short A times. Honestly, my feeling is you need to push through.  Just grit your teeth, push him to stay awake longer and get down to two naps. The longer you drag it out the worse it is really  yes he will get overtired but he is already yk? Often pushing things and having a totally awful day or two bizarrely seems to reset everything, LO crashes and has a proper sleep and is then caught up and can get back on track.

Does he ever settle at night without a feed?  Just wondering if that may not be helping....

[Atomic1010]

Thanks. Yes he does settle at night without a feed occasionally but it's getting more frequent that he is having to be fed to sleep. Last night was worse after a day where he did 2 naps albeit they were for two hours each. So tired I can't think straight :-(

[Atomic1010]

Ps how do you know that teething isn't the issue? And how much sleep should a 6 month old be getting per day roughy? Thanks!