Support and Chat thread for moms of early waking toddlers

[LisaM]

Layla - thanks - I will try that starting next week once Phoebe has finished playgroup.  Had a hideous EW today of 3.40!!  she did doze off a couple of times but only for 10-20 mins, I hve no idea how she does it, I am feeling hungover today, only 5 hrs sleep and the rest of the week its been no later than 5am each day.  Still she did have 1hr 45 mins nap yesterday so its not all bad.  Maybe thats why she got up so early...she thought she'd had too much sleep!!!!!!!!!!!!  I hate it when she does that dozing because I have no idea how restful that sleep is and so no idea when to put her down for her nap.

Anyway, hopefully things will improve once I can be consistent.

thanks again

[lesorl]

I guess I'm joining the thread, as my lo has been up around 5-5:30am recently.  She's 18 months, and we've always had a terrible time with short naps.  Right now, I have her nap fixed at 11:20am, and she's been sleeping about 1 hour 20 mins.  I've been putting her to bed at 5pm, as she's up soo early and is so clearly OT.  We've had long NWs, as long as 3 hours.

How do I get out of this cycle? 

[RegMum]

First a brief update on my situation - our EWs with our 21 MO lasted about a month, and seem to be primarily due to teething pain interfering with good sleep. Now she doesnt seem to be teething her 2 yr molars anymore, but unfortunately none of them broke through, so we will be in for the long haul again soon i'm sure.... Now she seems to be in a sleepy growth spurt cycle, so we will enjoy while it lasts!

Lesorl, your LO, minus the NW, seems to be on a near perfect 12 hr cycle, with 5pm put downs and 5-530 wake ups.....  In terms of getting her back to a more normal schedule, I would recommend moving her nap back a little (mine goes down between 12 and 12:15, and I find feeding her lunch really helps bridge that last tired spell if she's really knackered), and trying to get her down closer to 7pm over a few days.  I find a nice long bath can also help get them to stay up a little longer without getting all wound up.  Then, hopefully you will only have to deal with the NW
For the night wakings, have you determined if it is a teething issue?  We had trouble around 19M - she was waking up 3 am vomiting every 3-4 days, and waking most of the other nights at seemingly random times.  Pain killer didnt really seem to help in our case, but it did pass.  If the NW are at the same time, have you tried W2S? Otherwise, you can try to consistently react the the NW, if you are not already - doing WIWO or PU/PD, whichever works better for you.

[Sima]

My lo is 19 months old..have been struggling with naps and EW.
Her schedule usually:
wake up 5.30-6
Nap 12-1.15 (once in a while 2 hour naps)
BT 6.30-7

Because she takes 1.15 min often her bedtime is 6.30 and then she gets up early.  What can I do to move her bedtime later?? 

If her naps were 2 hours most of the time, then I would have no problem.  I tried putting her earlier for naps but still...she wakes up 1.15min later.  She does sleep through night though. 

Can anyone help me with any ideas; thank you in advance

[Cats]

I've been reading your posts for quite some time, and am finally joining in.

My DS is 18.5 mo, and I can count on one hand the number of times he has slept more than 10 hrs overnight in his lifetime.  Until about a month ago, he had been sleeping 8p.m. to 6 p.m., napping anywhere between 1- 2hrs at around noon.  He falls asleep easily, quickly, and by himself, in his own crib, and sleeps through the night.  Recently, he started spending one night a week at grandparents house, where he sleeps on a mattress on the floor in their room.  Since then, he's been waking up earlier and earlier -- we haven't made it past 5:15 or so in more than 4 weeks.  The 5 am wake-ups are hard, but I'm also worried about the total amount of sleep he gets in a day (ave. 11 to 12 hrs in 24).  I'm contemplating trying an earlier bedtime, but that's a scary thought when we're battling such early wakings.  I'd be worth it, though, if he would sleep more hours overnight. For those who have had success with earlier bedtimes extending overnight sleep, do you think it would work for a baby that's never really slept more than 10 hrs.

[Sima]

Hi Cats:
My lo is 19 months old...wondering what her sleeping schedule is like?

[LisaM]

Cats

For us a bedtime of 6pm can give her 11 hrs sleep, whereas a 7pm bedtime will only produce about 10 so she just wakes about 5am regardless of bedtime.  Occasionally, if had great nap and had later bedtime and gone to sleep about 8pm she has slept til about 6am (like your lo was doing) so did wake later but still only about 10 hrs at night.  So early bedtime can give her best amount of total hours sleep but also sometimes she will wake even earlier.  Its difficult to know what to do for the best, however, if your lo is getting really tired with the EW etc maybe you could try early bedtimes for a few nights so he can catch up. 

Good luck
Lisa

[mummywalks]

Hi, my DS is 17m and the youngest of 4 (ds1 11, ds2 8, dd 3) his day goes like this, wake up crying 5.30-6am breakfast at 7am play til 10am nap til 12pm then lunch, play til tea at 5pm, bath at 6.30pm story falls asleep on own by 7pm some eves has a whinge at around 9.30pm but only a couple of mins then settles again.He is so loud he is waking other children too so a miserable house.
HELP, HELP, HELP, PLEASE.

Sharon x

[Cats]

Liam's schedule is something like:
5 to 5:30 - wake.  I try not to go in until 6. Sometimes he plays quietly, sometimes not.  If he gets up closer to 5 a.m., I get him sooner, as he will only last about 30 minutes in his crib alone.
6:30 - milk
7:30 - breakfast
11 - lunch
between 11:30 to 12:30 - down for nap, sleeping anywhere between 1 to 2 hrs (I usually put him down closer to 12:30, my in-laws who watch him on the 3 days/wk that I work will put him down earlier, even as early as 11 a.m.  Nap time/length doesn't seem to affect his nighttime sleep at all)
6 - dinner
7:30 - bath, ready for bed
8 - in bed, usually asleep within 5-10 minutes
I'm wondering if he's now so used to sleeping <10 hrs a night that he can't sleep any longer.  Do you think you can get a baby that's only ever slept 10 hrs/night for 18 mths to suddenly add an extra hour?

Lisa - have you ever put your lo down earlier, and had her wake even earlier?  I know I should try the early bedtime thing, but I'm wondering if it's too late now to try.  I'm terrified of putting him to bed at 7 and having a 4 a.m. wakeup call.

[DebLillian]

After 7 months of EW I think we've finally found our solution... Since she will not play by herself and she needs to use the potty upon waking I take her right to the potty at the usual 4:45/5am then instead of trying to convince her to sleep as I have tried in many ways I tell her she doesn't have to sleep BUT it's mommy and daddy's sleepy time so she must be quiet.  I bring her into our bed and put toys on the floor.  Sometimes she'll snuggle, sometimes she'll get down and play (rarely) but I keep telling her that it's not yet time for mommy and daddy to wake and she must stay quiet.  After a few mornings of protest it actually worked!!  It's not ideal but it's a far better solution than the nightmare we were dealing with.  Hopefully that can help someone out there that is dealing with a lark like ours.

[DanielandHarry]

I have some good news, with Dan at home Harry has pushed his nap back naturally to about 10.30-11ish and is sleeping for 1-1.5hrs only. He isn't waking just as early now either it has been about 6-6.15 for the last week or so. We are also trying him in bed earlier but are met with a lot of resistance (screaming fits etc) is he too old to try PD?

D was doing an 8am-9.30ish day, now he is home I'm getting him up at 7 (i was leaving him to the last minute before as he needed as much sleep as possible before nursery) and creeping his bed time back slowly, he has been in bed and asleep for 9.15 most nights for the last week this week we are aiming for bed at 8.40 and asleep for 9. We are working on about 15min earlier each week so hopefully he will be asleep by 8.15 the week before school.

[LisaM]

Cats - we used to have wake ups between 4-4.30am for absolutely months on end and yes she had early bedtime of 6pm always at this time.  However, the EW started when she was going to bed later and so I went to earlier bedtime to help any OT.  But  guess she got used to the wake up time and eventually we tried putting her to bed later 7-7.30pm and she did shift to more like 5-5.30am wake up but still only 10 hrs of sleep.  As I said before now if we have 6pm bedtime she still normally will sleep til 5am so gets 11 hrs sometimes, however, I am really trying to get bedtime later because with a 5am wake up everyday its so hard to get her to a lunchtime nap.

Its really hard to know what to do for the best isn't it?  Sorry I'm not really able to give you any direction.  I just wish I had one of those children who love sleeping 12 hrs at night - she did that one time only and was from 5-5am and had gone to bed so early cos was ill and a lot younger.  Never happened since!!


Sharon - has ds always woken up crying in the mornings or is this a new thing?  Did he used to sleep in later than this?

He does seem to have a long A time in the afternoon - has it always been like this, maybe he is getting OT by bedtime - could you try pushing the nap later in the mornings?

Deb - glad you have found a compromise to the EW problem - I always think well at least when they are old enough I can send dd downstairs to watch tv for a bit until it is an acceptable hour for me to get up - bad mum I know!
 

[DebLillian]

Lisa- I keep dreaming about the TV situation too!!  Once she can turn the thing on that is the plan.  Perhaps bad mom, but I think I'm a better mom when well rested so it's a decent trade off...

[Sima]

Cats: thanks for posting schedule.  My lo 19 month also struggling with naps- 1 hour naps- and early bedtime and usually means EW.  Anyways,
I found that putting her later did not mean sleeping later.  He wake up time is 6 and after recording some of her patterns, I noticed that she sleeps 11 hours.  Maybe your lo sleeps 10 and that is it.  I am no expert though. But keeping a record of sleep pattern helped me.

[Cats]

We've decided to bite the bullet and try an earlier bedtime (7-ish) to see what happens.  Wish us luck! If someone could just tell me for certain that Liam really only needed 9 - 10 hrs of sleep a night, and that was totally enough for him, then I'd be able to deal with the early wakings better, I think.  But I'm forever wondering if there's something I could/should be doing to help him sleep more, which causes more anxiety than being up at the crack of dawn.  My problem is that I'm a bit of an insomniac so I often can't fall asleep until past midnight, no matter what time I go to bed, which makes the 5 a.m. wake-ups a killer -- I wish I could just adjust my schedule to match his better, but I just can't fall asleep at 9:30 -10 p.m., which makes me totally fixated on his sleep.  Argh! Who knew sleeping could be so difficult!