and also remember that everyone, children and adults, everyone, wakes many times per night, it is absolutely normal. The sleep cycle ends, we wake briefly, turn or fidget a moment and go back to sleep. The transition is so smooth (due to being independent sleepers) that we usually do not comment on it, do not call it a NW and do not even remember it happening. This is why parents with independent sleepers (or dependent sleepers who are co-sleeping so have their dependency there all night - the prop that helps them drift back to sleep) do not know how many times their child wakes in the night, it's because the child doesn't need them.
I see what you say about ind sleep but really are those who ss really waking that much and anyway this really us too much isn't it.
So, yes, they really ARE waking that much in the night because we ALL do. The choice at each waking is to either self settle and return to sleep or seek stimulation (calling out, sitting up, opening eyes...). Those who are independent know they want and need to return to sleep, just like adults, because it is night time.
It's 11.20 just had third nw and ss with a hand on back and kind words so far.
IMO this is not self settling/soothing. This is settling with help from you. Now I'm not saying you did the wrong thing but this is not an independent settle.
Honey, you are worried about his lack of sleep but why not find that sleep from 4.30am onwards instead of looking to give a nap in the day??
