anyone want to chat about the 2-1 nap switch?

[Carmela's Mom]

Yes!  I do!!!!  Can you believe they are 1???  How are you feeling about it.  So bittersweet huh?  I am having a hard time since Joey will probably be my last!!!!!! 

[OliverRowland]

not much time here as Oliver is crying in his crib.  yesterday we had our first 1 nap day which was ok considering.  but today...argh!  He woke his usual 6-6:15.  i thought for sure he would go down easily for am nap but NO!  He keeps sitting up and everytime I lie him back down he CRIES!  I thought he was tired so I just don't understand why he won't sleep?  I had to leave the room cause I am going to loose it.  And the usual, whenI leave the room HE has completely lost it.  SO i have to take a breath and go back in.  So, what do I do???

[OliverRowland]

yikes, now what?!  I went in to a him crying so hard he was coughing... .  I picked him up and sat down to calm him down.  He was alseep in my arms within a minute!  What is going on with my Oliver??  This is such a sudden change!  So, he fell asleep at 10 (30min later than usual nap time) but I just cannot wake him now cause he is obviouslt tired.  But what do i do as to not ruin the rest of the day?  and how on earth do I get this new baby down for sleep?!   i am up you know what creek without a paddle!

[texasmom]

Sophie,
Collin did that same thing a few weeks ago.  I figured out that he wasn't feeling well and was overtired.  But I APed too!!  Someone told me it's not APing if you do it on purpose.  I had to rock Collin to sleep for about a week or two (not every sleep time, but a lot).  It scared me too, thinking it was becoming a habit, but then he stopped needing it.  He was doing the SAME thing you describe.  Exactly.  So obviously I don't know why Oliver is doing that, but it could just be a little phase.  Anyway, when Collin isn't feeling well or is overtired, the ONLY way I've been able to get him to sleep is to hold him.  That may not have been the right thing to do, but I tried pd/wo for a long time, and it just made it worse.  I decided not to worry unless it continued.  I don't know what to tell you, but I just wanted to share that and say hang in there.  I'm sorry it's so rough right now.  Maybe just keep doing what you have done (sit in his room until he goes to sleep, keep trying baby whisperer tecniques, and only hold/rock if you have to).  I'm thinking maybe it's just temporary like Collin.  I don't know for sure obviously, but it's going to be ok.  This won't last forever!!!!! 

Carmela's Mom,
I can't believe they are 1.  Yesterday I was thinking of what I was doing at this time last year and when he was born, etc...  Collin was my first, so I had no idea what I had in store this year!!     I can understand being sad, thinking this is your last.     I have one on the way.     Not planned by us, but here he/she comes anyway!  We're happy.  I'm just SCARED.   

Anyone who might have advice for me  ,
I'm not sure what is going on.  If anyone has insight, I'm all ears. 

Here WAS our routine (generally, but not every day):
Wake 6/6:15
Nap 9:30/9:45 (1.5 h)
Nap 2:30/2:45 (1.5 h)
Asleep 7:30ish

(He only sleeps about 10.5 h at night and 3 h during the day.  He's always slept less than others.) 

Then things just got wacky.  Some days sleep late, some days late bedtime (couldn't fall asleep), a couple of times no afternoon nap.  Collin will miss sleep for different reasons and then after a couple of days he will have a catch up day and get back to normal.  He hasn't been sleeping as much lately (which is what bothers me more than anything - sometimes only 12-13 hours a day!), so I have been waiting for that day that he will catch up (which is why I haven't cut his morning nap yet - I don't want him to be overtired), and it hasn't come.  This weekend was off b/c of his bday party, church, etc...  So I thought he'd catch up this week, and he hasn't.  His A times have been shorter, so I know he is tired.  (today was normal though)  The past three days he's taken two 1.5 hour naps and has gone to bed at regular time, BUT he's waking up early.  And for a long time, he would fix himself by taking a big nap or sleeping in, but he hasn't this time.  The past 4 days he's woken b/w 5 and 5:45. 

So if anyone has experience with this, I'd love to hear your thoughts.   

Brooke

[OliverRowland]

Brooke, this new Oliver is frightening to me cause I just don't know what to do with him!  I wish we had succeeded months ago with better independent sleep but what can I do?!

So I let Oliver sleep for 25 min and when I woke him, he was super upset.  Settled down after a couple of minutes though.  So, I am wondering now if i should be offering am nap a bit later as he is obviously tolerating more A time.  should I be doing 10-10:30 and 1:30-3pm instead of 9:30-10 and 1-3pm?   

Brooke, the only thing that has helped us with early w/u is tweeking his routine.   And I did notice that cutting the am nap was the best thing for nighttime sleep.  It doesn't happen over night but it eventually really works!  I am learning from the others that it is a very big risk taking period and a hard transition and there seems to be less consistency....like the last couple of days have been for OLiver!

[texasmom]

Sophie,
I know, I get so scared when Collin does things, and I don't know how to handle it.  You have tried to get him to sleep independently.  It's not like you have been APing this whole time.  Maybe he began SA early.  It will pass.  It will.  Just keep doing what you know to do - keep trying to teach independent sleep.  I know that there have been times when it seemed what I was doing wasn't working, and all of a sudden, it worked. 

Wish I knew the answer to the nap time question, but this is all new to me! 

Ok, I AM going to cut the a.m. nap.  But maybe in a few days?!?     Do any of you keep track of overall sleep (per day)?  I do b/c Collin gets overtired easily, and we have battled off and on with early wakings since 5 1/2 months.  Without fail, he wakes early if he is overtired.  That's why I am afraid it's because he's not getting ENOUGH sleep.  Urg urg urg!

[M and N's Mom]

Arghgh!  I already wrote this and it was lost so I try again 

Deb, Stacy, Kathryn, Layla (or anyone else) I have another question,

We have moved from a 40 min to a 30 min am nap the past 2 days.  Yesterday looked like this:

6:30-9:30 A
In bed 9:30, asleep at 9:40, woke him at 10:10
Back in bed 12:40, asleep at 1:00
Woke him at 3:00
In bed at 6:30, asleep very quickly

BUT he has been very cranky after the 30 min nap.  I'm assuming that since 40 min is a sleep cycle and 30 mins isn't that's why but should he get used to this or do I have a fussy toddler to look forward to every day?

Also, he cried for about 2 mins at 8:30 last night, and both pm naps (yesterday and today) he has woken after 20 mins for a few minutes and then gone back to sleep.  I'm just trying to be careful that he doesn't get OT.

Thanks for your thoughts 

[debo620]

M and N's mom,
I think it actually sounds like things are going really well since you are getting a 2hr pm nap. I think give it a few more days with the crankiness. Are you waking him gently?, maybe just open the door at the 28min mark and let him sort of wake on his own.

[Isabella's Mummy (Lilab4)]

Brooke - We were / are getting early wake ups with 3hrs of nap time. We are now cutting am nap to 1hr or 45mins depending on wake up time and it seems to be working so far..... teething is playing havoc at the moment though 

[becky1969]

Brooke - my LO is also very sensitive to being OT. He'll short-nap or have nightwakings when OT. So I totally understand your fear. I felt the same way when someone told me to shorten that AM nap! I actually put it off for over a month (and was miserable in the meantime with a crazy baby).  What we did was shorten the AM nap to 45 minutes at first (you can try an hour if you're nervous), and then put down for 2nd nap earlier than normal since he didn't get as much sleep during that first nap. It worked like a charm! He slept SO much better at night, and his PM nap was usually 1.5-2 hours, so he still got the same amount of daytime sleep (and sometimes more).

What I told myself when I made the leap to waking him from that AM nap was that if it didn't work out, I could go back to the old way after we tried it for a few days. We never went back.  Hang in there! This is a challenging period!

[texasmom]

Ok, thank you ladies - so much!  I am convinced to at least TRY cutting the a.m. nap.  Today his morning A time was 3.75 h and afternoon was 4 h - all of the sudden he is able to go longer.  I almost thought we weren't going to get an afternoon nap today.  He laid in there for 20 min having a big party and then slept 1.25.  Anyway, I HAVE been putting this off, but I think it's a good idea.  Don't you just feel so guilty waking them from their sweet, peaceful sleep? 

Anyway, one more question is...  if I cut the morning nap to 1 hr or 45 min (still not sure which to do???), how much do I shorten A time? 

Lila,
Sorry about the teething.  It's a boogar!  We just went through over a week of it ourselves. 

[KathrynK]

M&N's Mom, Sophie was cranky at first when we went to 30min naps, but she did get used to it. tbh, even though some days she was cranky for a while after waking, it was totally preferable to letting her sleep a little longer and then refusing the pm nap or waking at 5am! So I just stuck with it and rode it out 
hang on in there!

Brooke, we went to 1hr am naps at first, but after a week it still hadn't made that much difference so we went to 45mins, and that really sorted her out.

[M and N's Mom]

Well, he woke 25 mins later than the past 2 mornings after doing 2 days of 30 min nap    Not a huge amount of time but going in the right direction!

[Carmela's Mom]

My son gets a little cranky after a 30 min nap, but it is so worth it for me to deal with a little bit of crank (it usually goes away after lunch) to have a 2-2.5 hour nap after lunch! 

[EsMum]

Hi ladies,

So I'm back.  I've been trying new nap times for 5 days now, to try and stop crying at nap #2.  I had been gradually shortening the first nap to 1hr, then 45mins.  The times that were suggested this time were 30mins at 9:30 and a long nap from 1-3.

To say things have gone from bad to worse is putting it mildly.  She now cries most times when we put her down to sleep.  4 our of 5 days this week it took her over an hour to go to sleep for nap 2.  I had to do more AP this week than I have in a very long time.  I have to stay in the room with her every time now until she falls asleep.  And this afternoon she ended up absolutely hysterical but I was eventually able to get her to sleep using AP (she didn't cry at all when she went down for her nap this morning).

So what's next?  I am absolutely at my wits end over this.  I worked so hard for months to get her to sleep happily and independently and not AP, and now it's all screwed up again.  I have absolutely no idea what to do.

Help!  Thanks,
Michelle.