WEANING thread #2... Come share experiences and offer support

[Winny]

Thanks Saralw, I will need to try switching the pattern gradually, probably bringing the time further and further away from the napping and sleeping time. The snack idea is good, I will try that. Hopefully she will feel satisfy and sleep easily.

While the difficult time, I try WI/WO, cause she could sleep by herself before. I would wait for 1 to 2 minutes before I visit her. Cause I realise that when I visit her before she really started to scream helps to calm her down more quickly.

Well, after 4 weeks of crying before every nap and sleep time. She suddenly calmed down and fall asleep by herself again. Thank goodness.

Good luck to your first "real weaning", I hope it all goes well for you.

[Gypsymom]

I started posting this in Extended Nursing, but then thought it really belongs here...

DS has started signing for milk (he's understood it for awhile but now he's doing it himself)! It's adorable, but coming right when I want to start reducing feeds! I need to be away from him in mid-September so I wanted to take this summer to very slowly, very gently, wind our BF relationship to a close. I can't decide whether to start offering a sippy of cow's milk after his naps, or just snacks. I haven't given him eggs or milk, but he's had things made with these ingredients. He has recently started on cream cheese on toast which he loves and last week I tried yogurt mixed with fruit which was also taken well.

He is 12.5 months and currently nurses at waking, and after each nap, and before bed. Any advice on which daytime feed to drop first? Could I do both of those by mid June? The poor little turkey is getting used to a new caregiver and is showing signs of getting 1st molars so if anything, he wants extra nursing these days!!

[EloysH]

Gypsmom:

I found the naps easiest to wean off first, then the morning feed then the night feed.   In the day they seem to be easy to distract with a snack, so fairly easy to drop.  You could defo do it by mid June, I took about a week to drop each one and then held on to the last feed for 2 months. I didn;t offer any milk in place of the feeds, excpet forthe night feed.  Even then he only took a sip of the milk, so I soon phased it out.

Use Dh to do the bedtime routine if you can to phase out the night feed.  As for the morning feed, get up before him and have breakfast ready, then you can whisk him straight into eating and hopefully he will forget the feed.  Especially if he loves his food, make his favourite breakfast.


There is heasps if info on how people did it if you read back through this thread also.

good luck

[Gypsymom]

Thanks for the suggestions. I will read back as you suggest :=)

[Gypsymom]

DS is almost 13mo. I am on day 2 of not offering the post-morning nap feed. So far, so good. We gave him lunch early. He was fussy in the afternoon yesterday and wouldn't go down for his nap for his caregiver. I was able to get him to nap (without milk, but I assured him he would have it when he woke). I am offering a sippy of cow's milk at meals (in his highchair) and water at other times. I was somewhat uncomfortable last night which surprised me (just one feed less and the girls protest!?). I guess I've never really skipped though (I've always pumped if I didn't feed). We'll see how he does this afternoon.

I plan to drop the post-afternoon nap feed "cold turkey" in 7-10 days.I like the idea of leaving the bedtime feed for last, but he takes a far longer feed in the morning (and very insistently signs for milk if DH gets him up while I shower). For those who've been here... would it be helpful to reduce the minutes I nurse him the morning, prior to dropping the feeding entirely? Maybe for my own comfort rather than his?

[Gypsymom]

I think my question above came right around the time the boards went down. I have managed to drop both daytime feeds and things are going well. A little fussier than usual, but mostly he's keen to eat solids. In fact, he's now nursing much less upon waking and is eager to get on to breakfast! Do I try to get him to take a full feed? He keeps bobbing off and wanting to play or go eat. He's almost 14 months and even at bedtime, he is taking far less milk - is this self-weaning? Today I don't think we even got to let-down although I did offer both sides.

[Erin (redstarfalling)]

Could be a nursing strike or the start of self-weaning.  I'd suggest just going with the flow and encouraging as full feeds as you can - dark, quiet room right when he wakes, offer both sides.  He may get more interest back in the future.  Now that he's over a year, he can get his nutrition from other sources, so watch for protein, calcium, fluids, healthy fats etc from his solids, and see what he does.

[Gypsymom]

Thanks, Erin. So I don't have to try to fully drain each side? If I can only get him to nurse for 10 minutes, I offer 5 minutes on each side?

He is teething (molars!) but usually he wants to nurse when he's not well. I have noticed that he's fussier with food though.

I did break down and BF at night a few times while we were on vacation, but luckily he has not been expecting this now that we're home again :-)

[Erin (redstarfalling)]

I wouldn't sweat it - 10 min total is a fair time for a bf at this age.

[johanna01]

Have just read through this thread and feel sooo much better.  I've been trying to gradually wean my 11 mth old, and am down to 3 feeds/day.  One on waking, one after afternoon nap (I've already dropped the one after the morning nap) and one about 45 mins after dinner.  I read him a book before bed, so he's going to bed awake.  So far, so good!  The trouble has been getting him to take in liquids of any kind by any means.  He took a bottle up until about 9 mos then gave it up, and won't take more than a sip or two at a time from sippy cups, straws (plastic juice box), or regular cups. 
My concern is that I go back to work full-time in 3 weeks, and I'm super stressed that he won't drink enough.  Thanks to others' postings here, I'm going to bite the bullet, and take away the afternoon BF.  Hopefully he'll be thirsty enough to want to drink more.  Thanks for being a place where I can make a commitment to myself to do it - I need to in order to give DS & I enough time to adjust.  I think I'm so dreading going back to work that it's making it that much harder to 'want' to wean.  I'm consoling myself somewhat by planning on keeping the morning and night BF for as long as DS & I want!

[EloysH]

good luck with going back to work in 3 weeks, it sounds like a great plan. 

They really do drink what they need, and do build up more sips over time. It amazes me how little LO drinks during the day even though I offer water alot, I don't think they really need much. He still only has gulps here and there,  never drinks more than 50ml at a time.  His nappies are still wet when they should be. My theory is that as long as liquids are on regular offer, they will regulate their need for water/milk.

[johanna01]

Thanks again for your advice throughout this thread! 
I offer water all the time, too, and DS only takes small sips.  I read somewhere "reputable" that they should be drinking 750ml of milk a day, and be able to drink 250 ml (8oz) in one 20 min sitting!  No way my LO will go for that, so good to hear yours is the same way.
LO is down now, and I'm off to *pump* for when he wakes up   I'm sure it will go fine, more stress on us than them!

[Gypsymom]

How did it go, Johanna?

Yesterday, DS insisted on breakfast immediately upon waking. I figured he would just have the feed afterwards, but I couldn't get him to take it. So I pumped for the first time in ages and only got 2oz on one side and 1oz on the other. Isn't that way low?? He usually nurses 30 minutes in the morning and about 20 minutes (but not much hard sucking) at bedtime. I want to go down to one feed per day now (and am TTC) but keep changing my mind which one. I'd like to go for a run first thing in the morning (rather than waiting until after the BF when it's much hotter) AND I'm ready to spend a night or two away (finally!). I'd like him to go down easy for someone else (although others here have recommended against a bedtime bottle at this stage). Perhaps it's time to hang up my nursing bras altogether. DS doesn't seem to care nearly as much now. Two cents??

[Gypsymom]

Perhaps I won't get a choice. I've been trying to move BF to earlier in the bedtime routine, but DS won't have it. He just keeps bobbing off and saying/signing "play, play". When I tried just before bed and he was tired, he was happy to snuggle in and take a good feed. I'm thinking this means that I'll have to drop the feed cold turkey...

[Gypsymom]

Just thought I should let y'all know that dropping the bedtime feed went far better than I would have guessed!! DH stepped up and took over putting DS down for a week before I tried the new routine (and I can do it too without being asked for milk - hurray!!). It didn't work to move the feed back to earlier in the feed as others had recommended, but over the course of a few weeks, I could tell that he really wasn't nursing much at all but just indulging in a long cuddle. So now we are doing a modified version of how we put him down for naps (which includes him turning out the light himself). A song in the dark room, while holding, and then laying down awake. Sometimes we continue to sing in the dark until he gets a little more settled, but I've also been able to leave right away too. If there are a few protest cries. I go back in and touch his forehead lightly and walk back out. If he cries again, I repeat, but the most I've had to do this is twice. Then he just quiets down and goes "nai nai".

So now we've just got the wake-up BF left which he asks for eagerly, but many days doesn't really actually want for more than a couple of minutes. Perhaps we are nearing the end although I'm willing to continue this feed for a long while yet if he wants it. Now that bedtime milk is gone, I think I will soon get to spend my first night away from him (15.5mos!!).

How are the rest of you weaners (haha!) doing??