1-0 no idea need help

[creations]

Here with a hug. Sorry I couldn't get on earlier. xxx

I would certainly go for the plan of 45 min nap but later in the day. Keep BT the same.

I see you already answered my earlier question and that he is calm at BT and drifts to sleep well, also that he has always taken this amount of time to fall to sleep so it is normal for him.  Moving the nap later in the day could help reduce the EW (it's a standard method to stop EWs) and so lengthen his night.

I would aim a little later than Katherine's suggestion of 2/2.15 because many of his naps are close to 2pm already. So I would do:
2.10 to 2.15 for the next few days, then move again to 2.30 and hold there.

I'm so sorry that all the different idea are confusing for you. Please know everyone wants to help in the best way they can.
Many hugs honey xx

[Straffles]

It's because I'm so sleep deprived and anxious that I get confused, not because I'm not deeply grateful for your amazing support.

Benji slept 7.15-6am - just. Resettled at 4.45 ew.

I don't know if that is a long enough night to stick with the 45mins nap at same time? It's 11.5 sleep total so not exactly a catch up.

I'm loath to chane anything though unless wu is before 6. I don't see 6 as an ew?!

So maybe stay put today and if ews don't get better decide whether to cal nap or push later as you've all suggested. XxxX

[creations]

before everything got messy, B was sleeping 12hr+ total in 24

Going by what you've said here I would say a total of 11.5hrs is not bad at all. All LOs go off track in transition plus sleep needs have likely changed, dropped a little.  He may well need more than 11.5hrs total but may not be able to achieve it just yet because of the transitional period.
WRT ew, he is quite often waking at 4 something where you need to resettle or he is up for the day, I think. I agree with you in your last post that 6am is a decent WU time. However earlier today you were very concerned about EWs (you mentioned 4.45am) which is why we are dealing with it. Moving the nap later may help with this. He may still stir at 4 something, he may self settle, he may be easier and quicker to to resettle.

not because I'm not deeply grateful for your amazing support.

Don't fret, we all know you are grateful. We are all happy to be here holding your hand x

[Buttonbobs]

Absolutely ^^^ this, more (((hugs)))

[kaipooi]

Hi Straffles, how are you doing? Since my time zone is the closest to yours, thought I would check in to see if you are ok.

[Straffles]

Hey Jacqueline and everyone - thank you

I allowed myself to stop worrying today as Benji slept til almost 6am pulling a 10hr40 night. Everyone agreed that's adequate.

But now, again, I'm nervous about tonight. If he sleeps another short night, I'm not sure where I stand as regards ideas about capping or pushing nap later.

One slightly longer night wd indicate nights are lengthening again and that's great for today. But another short night now and we wd be looking at four at less than the 11 he was sleeping the first days on a 45 min nap.

I just wish I had a plan or understood what to do in advance because otherwise I lie awake from around 1am panicking about it.

Would I be back at square one if he sleeps short again given that last night wasn't exactly a huge swing back to longer nights? Would I wait another few days? Or interpret the run of five short nights enough to indicate a problem and then guess at how to solve it ie cut/push later?

X

[kaipooi]

I am glad you took a break from worrying today

If he does a short night again, you could tentatively plan to push the nap out by 15mins. Keep it at 45mins. Not too many changes at the same time cos then you wouldn't know what worked and what did not. I say tentatively plan because, it could change depending on how he is tomorrow as well. I mean, if he is falling over and is a danger to himself, then just let the poor boy sleep 😛 but plan enough so that you won't lie awake at 1am worrying. I used to do that a lot or lie awake in the mornings just looking at the video monitor expecting him to early wake 😀

It could be another plan too. But just pick a plan and know that whether it is the right or wrong plan, you would finish it knowing what worked and what doesn't. So don't worry too much about picking the absolute right one. It really is a process of elimination. Some moms know their LOs really well and gets it right really fast. I take forever as I always pick the wrong plan. By the time I get it right, it only lasts a few weeks as my boy is ready to change his sleep needs and routine and I go bonkers all over again. Lol!

So breathe mommy, you are not alone

[creations]

Stopping by with a hug for today xx

[Straffles]

Thank you ladies so much.

Just a thought - shd I not simply be making bedtime a bit later? Isn't pd at 6.30 a bit early? It used to be pd at 6.45 and he fell asleep around the same time. But that was on a longer nap.

What do you think?

[creations]

I would leave BT where it is for now.
If he was resistant at BT *and* if he used to fall to sleep very quickly after PD I would agree to PD later, closer to the S time. But he isn't. From what you've said he has always taken his time to nod off, he is calm, so I would leave it as it is for him to have that relaxing time thinking over his happy day before he drifts off to dream land.

[Straffles]

Thank you creations, that is very reassuring.

I have an urgent question though: Benji is still sleeping after 2nws including ew at 5.

This is great! It's 6.15am and wu hasn't been later than 6.20 for ages.

But I'm confused. He is headed for an 11+ hr night by 6.30: does this mean I am supposed to jump to a nnd? What if he sleeps past 6.30?

Or does it just mean I am supposed to stick to 45min nap?

Won't his day be off and bt late if he sleeps so long in the am? Should I wake him? Anyone online? So confused I've been awake since 1 again

[Aishi]

I wouldn't wake in the morning. If wu is before 7.30 I would still offer nap at same time for 45 min. If it's later then I would do Nnd and ebt 10.5h after wu hth

[Straffles]

Why 7.30?
I've always thought 7??

[jessmum46]

Personally I would stick with the exact plan, same nap and same BT regardless of WU time and trust this is Benji learning to self-regulate.  If by some chance he refuses to nap then do a 10.5h day, but otherwise, hold tight.

[Buttonbobs]

I agree absolutely. If he's doing longer nights that's because he is adjusting and self-regulating. You only want to change things again when that stops working. If he's extending his mornings, stick with it xx