1-0 no idea need help

[Straffles]

Sorry ladies but this is what I feared all along. Stick with it for a week or two - then what?! It collapses and I've no idea why or what to do.

How long do I wait?

[Buttonbobs]

Hi honey, from reading previous threads, it does seem like Benji does take a while to get used to new patterns, and these shifts towards dropping naps completely will always cause some OT. The important thing is to give him time to settle and if it doesn't work then we suggest something else.

I know I'm not there with you, and you must be tired, but this pattern doesn't look significantly worse than a week ago - if anything the night sleep does look like there is a little improvement - I think you quoted 9hours above at one point i think.

How is his mood when you wake him from that nap now?

((Hugs))

[Straffles]

Thanks buttonbobs

Mood is good now on waking from nap

Id be scared to carry on much longer if he keeps doing 10hr nights and long nws though?

[kaipooi]

Hi,

Has he been averaging 10hr45 in the last 6 days? What was his average total before this began?

[Straffles]

Hi Hacqueline,

No he's been averaging more. Will post my eas as soon as I get a minute. Only last night was 10hrs.

[kaipooi]

Ok will wait for your post to see if anything stands out.

[Buttonbobs]

Yes it would be good to see your EAS. It does sound like he is nicely adjusting to the naps being capped though, so that's good.

If you could include in your EAS the length of the NWs that would be helpful.

((Hugs))

[Straffles]

Here's the EAS. I didn't record length of many of the NWs. Usually they're long if they need me to intervene.

I've always read more than one short night in a row as meaning there's something that needs changing as he starts to get overtired...to go from 11hr20 to 10hr20 seems dramatic to me

Date                   WU       Nap                            BT                  NWs                         AWAKE     ONS         Sleep total
Mon 17th Nov     6.20     1.46-2.31 (45mins)     7pm (pd 6)       10.15-10.30; 4.37        5.58         11hrs       11hrs45
Tues 18th Nov    6.15      1.49-2.34 (45mins)    7.08 (pd 6.30)  4.23                             6.20          11hr12    11hr57
Weds 19th Nov   6.30     1.51-3.36 (45mins)    7.17 (pd 6.30)   2.10-2.30; 3.30; 4.30  5.45         10hr30      11hr15
Thurs 20th Nov   6.30      1.50-2.35 (45mins)    7.13 (pd 6.30)   4.05                            6.13          11hrs       11hr45
Fri 21st Nov        6.30      1.53-2.38 (45mins)    7.00 (pd 6.30)   3.15-4.30                    6.20          11hrs20    12hr05
Sat 22nd Nov      6.20      1.52-2.37 (45mins)    7.23 (pd 6.30)   3.20; 5.15                   5.45          10hr22      11hr07
Sun 23rd Nov      6.20      1.54-2.39 (45mins)    7.22 (pd 6.30)

Oh yes, before everything got messy, B was sleeping 12hr+ total in 24. EVery so often there'd be a 9hr-10hr night in there. Then we got a really late night after doing a 1hr nap for a week and so I went to NND and that's where this all started.

[kaipooi]

From his past, has NWs in the later part of the night been a sign of OT for him? Just trying to figure out the NWs.

For my DS, OT produces NWs in the first few hours into the night. NWs in the later part were due to discomfort. And EWs could be OT or UT.

What I noticed is that on Tues and Thur, he had 13hr20 and 13hr28 days respectively. And only 1 NW  in each night. Would be interesting to see how many NW he got on Sunday night as it is another longer day.

[Straffles]

Please help me.

Our night was 9.5 hrs. He was awake at 4.45. I could not help him back to sleep. The best I could do was stay with him on the bed and read.

I don't know what to do today.

He is either ot or ut. I don't know. I just know his nights are shortening because his nap is 45 mins. I just know ews are getting earlier. I don't know what to do now. It's been a week on this routine. You said wait and see. I have waited and this is the worst it's ever been. I don't know what it means or what I should do. Pkease does anyone know. I can't get through the day. I know I have to give him a nap. But I know nothing else. If I keep on waiting it is clear his sleep will ahorten.but why and what do I do.

Btw:

I've no idea what his nws mean! I don't know how you ladies know! That's why I'm here for advice.

[creations]

Hugs honey. Try not to panic, I know easier said than done. You'll all get through this.

Could you try to describe how he is at BT. I see you put him down and he is awake a further 30-60 mins. Can you tell us what is happening in that time?
For instance, has he always taken a long time to fall to sleep, is that his usual way?
or did he used to fall to sleep within a few mins of PD.
How is he behaving in that time between PD and S? And what are you doing? Do you need to verbally reassure, cuddle, sooth, WIWO, or is it just leave him because he is quiet and happy to self settle?

Whilst I'm here I just want to reassure you that NWs are normal for both children and adults. Obviously what we want is for our children to stay calm and relaxed at their NWs and just go back to sleep. When there are NWs that need help (as your LO does) then yes they need attending to both at the time and in the overall plan. You will get there though. xx

[kaipooi]

Breathe Straffles breathe... If it helps at all, know that you are not alone. I am going through the same mess too. DS has been giving 9-10 hr nights. To the point where 10hrs is now a good night for me!! As I am writing this, DS has started to shift and turn (his wake up dance) and it has only been 9.5 hrs since he fell asleep. Another wonderful day awaits

I know it is the worst it had ever been. I say that A LOT too to DH every time I panic. But it is only because our LOs are growing up and their sleep needs decrease. A 9hr night may sound horrendous but it is probably equivalent to a 10.5 hr night when they were 12 months old. And we didn't panic as much then. I remember panicking and telling DH, "Oh no! He only did 11hrs last night!!!!". 😀

As creations said, could you describe how he is at bedtime? And nap time too. How is he through out the day? Is he calm during NWs?

[Straffles]

Bedtime he's been falling asleep peacefully just taking time and lots of chatting and needing me with him. He has rarely fallen asleep quickly.

Nws he always needs me he cries if he can't ss. No different from his normal nws really.

Last time sleep total was 10.5 hrs he started tantruming all afternoon.

I just done know what I'm supposed to do with ews. Can't go to no nap from 4.45am

[Straffles]

How many days of 10ish hrs sleep total can an lo realistically tolerate until you are in an inescapable ot mess?

I fear we are headed that way

[anna*]

Nothing is inescapable at this age honestly while it would be nice for everyone if he slept a bit longer, it's just not messy like if he was a baby. How about a Groclock or similar to deal with the EWs? These long NWs, what kind of help does he need from you, is this a real need or toddler tantrums about getting his own way?