1-0 no idea need help

[creations]

If 6pm is the BT you can manage I'd go with that. I'd just grit your teeth and do the NND regardless of WU time tomorrow because I think all the uncertainty is difficult for you. Whilst Benji's needs must be taken into account, yours need to be too, being awake half the night worried about his sleep routine is not doing you or him any good.
If he is very OT by BT it may not be pretty but one thing I am sure of, when LOs get really OT they eventually sleep.  Sometimes I think more OT is better than a bit of OT so the crash and decent catch up sleep happens sooner rather than later.

[jessmum46]

Yes this ^^^^^

[anna*]

Agree with 6pm bed. You can have him bathed/in PJs etc for 5, and just have some low key time even like an extended wind down.

[Buttonbobs]

Absolutely agree with creations last post in this one. Couldn't have said it better. Here with (((hugs))) for you xx

[jessmum46]

6pm is more realistic for us as an earliest bt. He will have to sleep past 7 tomorrow to get there but I can't see that happening really.

Jessmum you say you must stick to alternating nap day as written but you also say flexibility is needed.

What do you think the times for an alternating schedule should look like?  X

He doesn't need to sleep past 7am to get to a 6pm BT.  Do it regardless of WU and yes that may mean a 13h day.

I don't mean to confuse you when I said flexibility is needed that is my own opinion and why I would not personally have done strict alternating nap and NNDs.  I was happy to throw in a CN day as and when needed.  If a flexible plan is too stressful for you (and I think it is) go for alternating days and stick to that plan. 

As discussed previously on a NND do 6pm bedtime.  On a nap day do a 2pm nap for 45 mins (I think that's what you were doing?) and normal BT which I think was 7.30pm?  Please correct me if I'm wrong though, I'm suggesting your nap days should be pretty much what you were doing for the last week or two. 

[jessmum46]

Checking in with a hug and a hope that you managed to get yourself some sleep last night x

[Buttonbobs]

Thinking of you honey, lots of hugs xxx

[creations]

How's things?
Stopping by with a hug today x

[Straffles]

Keep meaning to reply but I'm on my phone...

[Straffles]

Ok so I didn't have the nerve to go to a nnd either yesterday or today. I need to see the plan straight until I go for it. Your suggestions are all helping me gain a clearer picture.

However I cannot see how I can just randomly set bt. If I set it at 6pm I need a 7am wu at least as the only chance of that 12hr+ night is if day is short enough. Last nnd I went for a 6pmbt off a 7.20wuband he was awake at 5am from 6.30pm falling asleep. It took weeks to recover from that.

If nnd is going to be 11hrs then Nd shd be around 14 hrs as per the plan so that means bt7.30/8 from a 5.30wu. Shd I get him up at 5.30 then? It also assumes you get at least 11hrs ons from a nap day. ATM jessmum we have just pushed Benji from a 6.30 to a 7pm pd at bt.

After the two 9.5ish hr nights he did 10.5 then last night almost 11ons. This cd be the looping or it cd be the later bt. He was it tonight but settled himself by 7.35.

Too tired now to remember all my questions. Got to go to sleep as the only sleep I get is this first few hrs if the night. Grr.

But yes it's setting these bts apparently arbitrarily when experience has shown he can't tolerate even an earlier bt. That's the main thing ATM.

I guess then there's how you stop him waking earlier and earlier if bt is so early.

If I go with bec's plan but push it slightly later I need a 7am wu at least for him to be able to manage an nnd and I need to jump from pd at 7 to pd at 8. That's scary

[anna*]

I guess then there's how you stop him waking earlier and earlier if bt is so early.

Groclock. Consistently applied. He's a toddler and toddlers will have big tantrums about it, but chances are (of course he may be the exception but most kids will) he will just start sleeping later. My kid was getting more sleep at 2.5 than he was at 18 months old, because of the Groclock.

[creations]

I second the gro clock. I would start with it right away.

If I set it at 6pm I need a 7am wu at least as the only chance of that 12hr+ night is if day is short enough.

I know bec's plan allowed for a 12 hr night after a NND but I'm not sure why you are hoping for 12hr+ when he isn't getting more than 12hrs sleep in 24 now??
If his night sleeps are ranging from 9.5 to 11.5 but seem more often to be somewhere near 10.5 then total sleep in 24hrs is more like
9hr 30 + 45 nap = 10hr 15
10hr 30 + 45 nap = 11hr 15
11hr 30 + 45 nap = 12hr 15
In transitional periods I don't think you can expect the longest nights. If you were to get 12hr then great but I'd have my expectations low.

[Straffles]

So creations how do I know when to set bt if day shdnt be longer that 11hrs??

[becj86]

I think you have to accept that 12hr sleep totals may not be something that sticks around long term if they happen much from now at all. The 10.5hr thing and TBH the 11hr day when nap dropping is a general rule when LO is at the younger end of the spectrum for dropping the nap. Benji actually self regulates really well when he's got something predictable so he would probably cope reasonably well with going CT to no nap with the odd nap if he's really struggling. It may well be a difficult first few weeks but it would even out pretty quickly IMO. Give. The lengt of time involved in the 2-1 for him and all the endless tweaking, it may be that going CT would be shortterm pain for long term gain with him getting a solid predictable routine pretty quickly.

[Straffles]

Can I do this?

Wu after 6.30 = NND with pd 6pm

Then

Wu before 6.30 = ND with pd 7.30

At present pd is 7pm - do I just push it later immediately? And should it more realistically be as late as 8?

Do I try to keep him resting in bedroom if he wakes before 6?

I'm looking for a gro clock online.

Is this going to push him too hard and if so do I do a really early bt of when??

Should I wait for a longer night with a long stretch first?

If I can't expect 12hr nights is 6pm bt on NND actually too early?

Thank you everyone.

Oh and will you be able to advise if it goes wrong?