I know it seems daunting, especially when you have read so many things about how bad the 2-1 transition might be.
There's no pressure to do this right now. let's just look, think, get the idea in our minds so we are prepared in advance and not caught on the hop if nights and naps go very short or if naps are refused.
OK, here I have slotted in an example of when milk and solids can come. Continuing with 5 milk feeds per day plus 1 at night and 2 solids meals, I also show where a 3rd solids would slot in when he's ready for it. I've used your feed timings as a starting point but tweaked a little to spread the feeds across the day.
With milk just before and right after the nap he should be fine to last a good nap length without being hungry (ie even a 3hr nap is still only 3hr between milk feeds).
Do remember this is only a guidance routine to give you an idea. In reality we start somewhere then adapt as needed.
This is how your day could look:
WU 8
milk 8
solids 9
milk 11
solids 12 with a top up milk directly after which comes just before nap
A 5hr
S 1-3 (uncapped, it's ok to sleep longer, even 3hrs is fine)
milk 3 or when he wakes
solids 4/5 (you are not doing dinner yet but this is where it can go)
milk 6.30/7 for BT
A 4hr
BT 6.30/7.00 (if he took a 3hr nap BT could be 7.30pm)
night 13 - 13.5
overall sleep 15hr+
one night feed
Yesterday he slept 2.5hrs for nap 1! ( mum put him down, I was out. She didn't cap his nap as I was going to take him out in the afternoon so I knew he would get really tired) was it OT accumulation from the past few days?
It looks to me like he is self regulating his sleep length based on the set times you are currently giving him. So, for a few days he cuts his night short, wakes at 7 instead of 7.30/capped, he naps short, 1 hr or 1.5 instead of 2hr/capped. Then after a few days of this he has accumulated tiredness (this does not mean OT or that it is a big problem but rather self regulation) he sleeps later in the morning and a longer nap.
It's fine to continue with this just now if you are more comfortable with it, but be prepared that there is likely to be a continuation of this self regulation meaning daily changes (or phases every few days) to WU time, nap reluctance (that day or 2 he didn't go to sleep until after 12), short nap etc followed by later WU, longer nap.
Whilst I totally understand reluctance to change the routine moving to 1 nap might actually provide you all with more predictability than with him self regulating in phases. When we began this thread he moved to a set routine fabulously, it removed all/most of the unpredictability of various WU times, various A times, various naps lengths and allowed you both to know what was to happen when.
It's important to say: You are his Mummy. It is totally your decision (and your DH).
All we can do here is offer advice and support based on the information we have, and we cannot offer any guarantee that it works out, it's our 'best guess'.
My concern, my reason for looking at a 1 nap routine and for a way to transition to that routine is that, if I don't propose this in in a timely manner, LO could quite significantly reduce his night sleep and naps or refuse naps. We *could* be looking at 5 or 6am WUs and messy nap times (ie if LO wakes at 6am the temptation is to move nap 1 earlier because he'll be tired, the day goes off track), it becomes harder to move that nap time later and head towards the 1 nap day when night sleep has been reduced this amount because it's harder to get to a 12 or 1pm nap, when nap comes too early you have to fit in another nap to get through the day, by offering a second nap he can then continue to take a short night (or long night wakings). It can become a bit of a trap.
That sounds scary hey? I don't want to scare you, I only want to explain why I've brought up the idea of a 1 nap routine.
So, there are a few more things I want to cover, I know you like to understand what's going on.
1. If you continue the current routine and if he does go through phases/cycles of shorter nights and naps followed by longer nights and naps...we can wait until the longer night/nap day arrives and then rapidly transition to 1 nap. The 7-10 day transition period I detailed above could be reduced down to a couple of days because we start with the day where the WU is later. This would be preferable all round I would think.
2. If you continue the current routine an suddenly start getting lots of nap refusals, 10hr nights or long NWs we can tackle that head on when it happens and come up with a plan to get out of it.
3. This day I have quoted below is actually pretty close to being able to manage a 1 nap day already. You wake him (so he could have slept longer in the morning), he takes a long nap (he could do a 2.5-3hr nap on a 1 nap day, it's a really good refreshing sleep rather than a 1hr nap plus a 25 min CN)
Yesterday: brought his out after nap 1.
Wu: 730am ( I woke him up)
Nap 1: 1115-140pm ( I am surprised! uncapped as we were going out later)
nap 2: 450-515pm ( slept in carrier. Capped)
Bedtime: 745pm ( I thought he may not be sleepy as nap 1 was so long. But he was pretty tired by then)
Last thing
Some questions about the transition days that you posted above.
Day 1 &2 :
WU: 7am
does that mean that I must wake him up at 7am?
For the whole schedule:
Do I cap all naps/WU/bedtime to follow the schedule?
No, the transition period is purely a way to move his nap later whilst we wait for WU time to move later. What we would look for is moving to the 'end' routine as quickly as possible but without suddenly making him stay awake from 7am (if he woke then) to 1pm. He can and has done a 5hr morning A time without problem so could possibly go directly from 8am WU to 1pm nap, but, he is used to set nap times and I would be inclined to move his 'set' nap time by 15-30 mins at a time rather than 1-2 hrs (even though he has done this himself before).
I hope I have not overwhelmed you with information!
Have a think.
We are here regardless of what you decide to do.
As always we can hold your hand through the process and as always we might not be able to get on *every day* or *exactly* when you need us to answer a question immediately but we would do our best to support you throughout.
