Longer and confusing NW

[JennVanessa1083]

Hey Timbler!

I hope you had a great trip! Thank you so much for your support; I really appreciate it!

[ginger428]

Today the am nap was 36 minutes which is fine but the pm nap he woke up at 28 minutes (I resettled) but then he only slept about 1:13 before waking up fussy before falling asleep agin on my shoulder after waking up fussy ugh.

This. The story of my life around that time. Haha. BUT IT PASSED! And for what it's worth, you really are doing the best you can and I admire that you are willing to soothe your babe and comfort him this way.  Every day might be different for a little while, but it will eventually fall into place. It did for us! I remember it getting really nice around the 13/14 mo mark... ups and downs of course, but mostly better. Half bdays and bdays are weird, so hang in there!

As for your EAS tomorrow, again, so hard to say, but my gut instinct is that he's OT for his pm nap along with BT being a tad late. Watch him tomorrow and if he needs go down a tad earlier for pm nap, do it. I would keep am nap where it is and not bring it earlier... that might cause earlier WU.  I think you're getting early NW's because of the OT. FWIW for weaning, I used GW and also reduced time BF... I literally timed each nf and reduced it by XX seconds each subsequent night for several days. Then I used a version of Elizabeth Pantley's method.. link below. Scroll down to PANTLEY'S GENTLE REMOVAL PLAN.

PANTLEY'S GENTLE REMOVAL PLAN

[JennVanessa1083]

Hi Ginger!!

I sooooooo appreciate your encouragement and sharing your experience. Makes me feel so much better knowing that hey I'm doing my best and that there is a light at the end of a long tunnel lol

Anyways, I agree with your gut instinct DS is OT and that's what's causing the EMW and NW. I plan on pushing up the pm nap by 10-15 minutes or earlier depending how he acts. I just got him to go to sleep despite me going for him being asleep by 3.5A. Once again he fought it until just before 3.75. We shall see how the night goes.

But I like the plan I'm wondering if I should still aim for bedtime with the same A or maybe even less like 3.25 to see if maybe as his OT resolves he stops fighting BT.

As for the gradual method of weaning. I am all for it! I would like him wean completely from BF by 12 months so I have my work cut out for me! I'll check out the link. How many seconds did you shorten it every few days. I feel like DS will fight the process so the more gradual the better in my eyes.

[creations]

Hi honey - just popping by

I haven't read your whole thread. I'm aware you have been away and your routine went off track but looking at the last couple of pages only perhaps gives me a different idea.

Can you remind me if your LO has been sleep trained and is an independent sleeper now?

To me the routine looks like he's on his 2-1 journey and honestly things just go haywire. Anyone who gets through that smoothly is blessed.  My DS's 2-1 was hard hard work, I try not to remember it but the memory lingers yk?

WRT the NWs and NFs I also have a different idea.  Now usually I am the one who goes for the gradual approach wherever possible, I don't like doing anything cold turkey although have been forced to on occasion.  But in this instance I can't help but think you need to just drop those NFs, IMO there comes a point where waking at night is just disturbing sleep and not really doing him any favours. I understand he is teething but teething almost never ends, mine was teething pretty much permanently through the entire year from 1yo to 2yo (we had three days off between canines and molars) and what's on my mind is that you want to wean BF in a month anyway but if you continue to BF for comfort you could end up at it another 12 months yet through that big teething time.  Is that something you could realistically cope with?  IIWM, in this case, I would grit my teeth and comfort him without feeding for his NWs.

Personally I think you might be better off with a new thread for 2-1 support or for dropping the NF support.  It's quite hard for anyone to join in when a thread is 9 pages and when various things have changed and a new thread could refocus everyone's attentions, including your own as it may be a case that with so many different things going on you are not fully focused on getting one thing straight yk?
IME when things are already off track it's a great time to 'fix' stuff.  Most of our best routine fixes have been when DS was ill or teething because he was already off track so I used it to my advantage.

Just my thoughts. xx

[JennVanessa1083]

Hi Creations!

Thank you for your insight! I was actually thinking about just dropping the feeds one by one; comforting in other ways and hoping it sticks. Realistically I don't want to nurse past 12 months but then I wonder if there is SO much work to do in such a short time with my DS who LOVES milk. I can post that on the breastfeeding thread?

He does self soothe to sleep however, I am there which I know doesn't exactly constitute as independent sleep. We share a room so there is no putting him in a separate room yk? Since our trip I have been working on getting back to SS since he was very clingy coming back and cried when I put him down in the crib. He is still not self settling properly! He either starts standing or crawling around playing or cries. I notice he only wants to sleep upright on my shoulder which leads me to believe it's the teeth. They are so close to cutting but I may have to consider giving him more than teething tablets before naps. He's in pain throughout the day biting things including me violently so I give him puree pops, cold washcloths or teethers

So in the last week I used gradual withdrawal to get him back there and hopefully SS. I know I will have to get to the place of just putting him down and walking away so I do need support in a gradual approach for an infant in the same room.

I agree it's definitely the 2-1; I have to strike the perfect balance of day sleep and A time to get the best nights. Before the trip, he was starting to do long 8 hour stretches, feed, then back asleep for another 2.5-3 hours. We had a pretty good routine going. Now we are back to square one with 2-3 NW a night and an added feed totaling to 2 NF ugh. Last night was 3 NW which one was before 3 hours after BT so I assume OT; he was also whimpering a lot in his sleep and rolling around a lot.

It's like he's so sensitive to A times. I definitely can't decipher the right A times and teething is not helping. Today he woke up after 25 minutes during his morning nap! He only went down 10 minutes after his usual time. I don't know if his OT is getting worse or the teething is 

So I guess my question is where do I post? In Naps? Here again just on a new thread? Do I do two posts: one for dropping night feeds and one for 2-1 support including gradually getting him to complete independent sleep?

Needless to say I need serious help!

Sorry for rambling!

[creations]

As I am useless with BF support I would first post there for dropping NFs. I would mention that you want to stop BF at 12 months if that is your plan.
I would imagine you could have all NFs gone in 3 days or a week max, it's not something that I imagine taking weeks and weeks.  then with that gone you can move on to support on the next thing.

Routine wise I would muddle through as best you can until you have those NFs gone (not talking months here).  It's the only thing I can think of really. I mean I'm not stopping you posting about 2-1 on a new thread right away, you can of course, it's only that in my mind the NWs for feeding are interrupting his sleep and what he needs is a really good long sleep so that you can move forward with the 2-1 routine.  I would also medicate with paracetamol and probably ibuprofen too, I did with mine.
It's only my opinion honey you need to do what you feel is right xx

[JennVanessa1083]

Thank you!

I will go ahead and post on the BF board to stop NF immediately. I think you are right about needing more sleep at night; his nights are not even 11 hours for the last few days so something is definitely going on. At this point with his teething, its so hard to know what A times are good especially with the broken nights. He is also extra clingy all day and night.Oh and to top is off he is working on standing alone so there's that too messing with his sleep a bit lol An all around exhausting time for the both of us!

Just to clarify (this a questions for everyone who has been helping on this thread lol): posting about the 2-1 transition should be on which board...naps?

I would like to see if maybe there's something missing in the daytime routine, maybe a blindspot or something.

[ginger428]

Yes, 2-1 in Naps. And there is a support thread for it that you can probably read through and follow.  But post your specific question and easy on new thread. Like Creations said, you might need to wait to see about day routine... And do what works each day as it comes.

I agree, lots going on and disrupted night sleep should be sorted.

Come to think of it, I think I did drop his last feed or so more quickly. I think the GW was when he was slightly younger? I do remember a time of holding him a ton when dropping a nf instead of gradually weaning (not recommending that but it's what worked for us). It's a jumbled mess in my head because his NFs lasted a while for us. Dropping quickly seems like a good idea since you have other things to sort out, but it might depend on how DS takes it.

For the time being, stick to an A that has worked and his body should adjust and be used to that time, especialy after sorting night sleep. Then reasses A times. This should help you with the day to day stress of trying tonfigure out times. Give yourself some slack and grace and maybe just use  a +/-15 min window for A times. It's a messy time but you'll get through it!

[JennVanessa1083]

Excellent! Ginger, I am not opposed to your strategy as my DS is needing extra cuddles these days anyways and something tells me he will not go quietly into the night lol

Thank you ladies so much! I will post on the 2-1 soon as I already posted on the BF board to start the weaning tonight. Wish me luck!

[creations]

Good luck honey xxx

And BTW, like I said I do not have BF experience so I'd go with the advice you receive on the BF board WRT NFs, pain comfort etc.

Some of our worst teething nights I had to bring my DS back down stairs, I'm not suggesting it as a first option, not at all, it was last on the list for me, just saying I have been there when it is seriously bad and know how utterly awful it is. Many hugs and pain-less teething vibes for your LO xx

[ginger428]

Hey Jennifer,
I just posted here because I forgot that we started new threads.  Going over to your new one to check in... if you could respond there as well.  Thanks!