Predictable Unpredictability - Please help us!

[labrodyk]

I don't think my children are trainable! I have NO idea how today went well but it did. Do you think I need to adjust bedtime or just let her be if she's not upset?! Fx tomorrow is similar but you never know with A!

WU: 6.25
Nap 1: 9.50; 10.00-12.00. No crying going down at all.
Nap 2: 3.00; 3.10 - 4.00. No crying at all either. I was going to wake at 4.15 but she was about to fall back to sleep after waking at 40mins so thought it was a better time to get her up!)
BT: 7.00. Read books after milk tonight just to break up bottle and bed, asleep 7.30 after laying quietly.

[becj86]

Yep, a good day. Hope today is similar for you! I think if she's happy to lie in bed and will fall asleep on her own, don't worry about it taking a little while for her to fall asleep.

[labrodyk]

Thanks Bec! Gosh things are hit and miss and I get really confused with the naps. I think I might need to set BT at 7pm with a nap cut off at 4/4.15. Last night she did great. Tonight not as good and whilst I did 3hr A she cried and had great difficulty settling and I needed to intervene!

What are your thoughts?

WU: 6.30
OOB: 7.00
E: 7.30 breakfast
A:
E: 9.00 bottle
A:
S: 9.50; 10.00-11.13; dozed until 11.28 when truly awake.
^ grizzly and upset going down
E: 12.30 lunch
A:
E: 2.00 bottle
A:
S: 2.25; 2.35-4.15
BT: 7.15; 8.00
^^ quite upset before bed, particularly rubbing eyes. Crying out and trying to settle after PD.
I wonder if I should have pulled back a little and done 7pm?

[becj86]

I think I might need to set BT at 7pm with a nap cut off at 4/4.15.

This seems pretty reasonable.

S: 9.50; 10.00-11.13; dozed until 11.28 when truly awake. ^ grizzly and upset going down

A wee bit UT, dyt? Not by much, though.

She seems to do better at BT if she's had one long (~2hr) nap in the day, would you agree?

[labrodyk]

She seems to do better at BT if she's had one long (~2hr) nap in the day, would you agree?

Yes, most definitely! But I can't seem to get that consistently! I wanted to do the set nap but how long she sleeps I completely dependent on her night length so I still don't get any real consistency!

She's been awake for the day from 6am trying to get back to sleep but awake fully from 6.30, so 10/10.5hr night at most

The whinging and crying most of the morning is getting really draining too! She's frustrated and not interested in her toys. Can't walk, doesn't want to crawl, not steady or strong enough to stand up. Then I try to put her down and she's exhausted, eyes closing in my arms and then crying all wind down and when I left the room. Only briefly because she was asleep in a couple of minutes!!

WU: 6-6.30
E: 7.30 breakfast.
A:
E: 8.40 bottle. Not really interested
A:  super fussy, tired, clingy and crying
S: 9.59; 10.03 fast asleep - 11.20, stirred and fell back to sleep several times. Her eyes are half closed and she waves her comforter around whilst she sucks her thumb. She drops the thumb and her other hand and then jolts and sucks again! Awake completely at 11.48 so I got her up.
E: 12.30; lunch
A:
E: 2.00 bottle. again, not that keen
A: super fussy, tired, clingy and crying
S: completely crashed in my bed whilst I was putting washing away at 2.45-4.03
A:
E: 5.15 dinner
A:
E: 6.50 bottle
BT: 7.10; 7.30
^^ whinging/crying going down

aiming for 7pm bedtime, hoping she's asleep by 7.45!

[labrodyk]

Oh Bec, absolutely horrific night!!!

Asleep at 7.30 but woke crying at 9.30. Resettled herself then woke every 40 minutes from 10-3! She was awake babbling at some points but mainly just couldn't sleep. I sat with her after 3am until close to 4am and she went back to sleep but cried out again at 5 and then awake from 6am but fell back to sleep at 7.30....for 5 minutes!

[becj86]

That's horrible

Ill? That'd be my first thought based on the irritability during the day and the wakings at night.

Hugs all 'round xx

[labrodyk]

Went to the doctor and ears and throat okay but pulling ears so think teething!!

Yesterday was;
Nap 1: 9.45-11.05 then dozed until 11.40
Nap2: out at a friends. Pd in her bed at 2.35 when she wouldnt stop crying! Only 30 minutes.
Bt: 6.30; crying. Did wi/wo and patted her and not asleep until after 7.30
Nw: 4.50am. Babbling ans crying until 6.30am
S: 6.30-7.20am

Nap 1: 10.00 in car  cried until 11.08-12.15 in the car. Had to wake her. No idea how she slept so long.
Nap 2: 2.30 in car. Asleep 3.35-4.05
No idea what do do for bedtime given last night!!! Im in the car for another hour until ar least 5.30! Not much time for dinner and bed routine!!

[becj86]

Nw: 4.50am. Babbling ans crying until 6.30am

Is this a waking around that time of morning that's getting worse or a one-off? If the former, you might consider pushing that first A time a bit more.

[labrodyk]

Is this a waking around that time of morning that's getting worse or a one-off?

I'm not sure to be honest. I just happened to be awake but I haven't heard her that early before. If I was to push A, I don't even know what I'm doing for A's anymore so not sure where I'd start...

Trying to aim for 6 or shortly after tonight... Really hoping she can SS, feels like ages since she has.

.... No such luck!! Down at 6.10 and has cried and won't settle since!! What am I meant to do with her A after such a short evening A. It's all over the place. She finally fell asleep just after 7.00!

Our morning continued with no tire signs and no grouchy/crankiness but as the morning wore on I had no idea how to structure the day if nap 1 was any later so I PD.

WU: ?
OOB: 7.00
Nap 1: 10.35; asleep shortly after. Stirred at 11.09, fell back to sleep until 11.35. Lay quietly with eyes shut sucking thumb but playing with comforter tag and trying to drop off to sleep again. Eyes wide awake at 12.00
Nap 2: 3.15-4.30 (I woke her)
BT: changed our bedtime routine and did milk and quiet play in lounge then brushed teeth and into bed, didn't fuss or cry and asleep within 20 minutes!

I really don't understand. Am I getting all these A's totally wrong? At least she didn't cry going to sleep for this first nap today but if she napped any later, how do I get her down again in the afternoon? Surely this isn't the 2-1?

[becj86]

BT: changed our bedtime routine and did milk and quiet play in lounge then brushed teeth and into bed, didn't fuss or cry and asleep within 20 minutes!

Prefers a shorter 'wind down' maybe? That or you held your tongue right

Surely this isn't the 2-1?

Depends what you call the 2-1... its a transition and whilst she wouldn't cope with one nap at the moment, it is part of the transition from 2 full naps to 1 nap.

[labrodyk]

Haha, you're probably right. BT not as easy tonight but today she has been SO miserable! I managed to push her through to almost 10am this morning and she pulled a 2hr nap but again cranky all of her next A so down a touch early and slept 1hr20.

WU:?
Nap 1: 9.50; 9.55-11.55
Nap 2: 2.50; 3.00-4.20
BT: 7.35; asleep 8.05. Cried out briefly 5-10mins after PD.

I'm really starting to think her 1hr20 naps are the equivalent of other bubs' 1.5hrs. Perhaps BT should have been later. I feel like her A's are really short but then she was in such a better mood this afternoon after two decent naps than the morning!

[becj86]

I'm really starting to think her 1hr20 naps are the equivalent of other bubs' 1.5hrs.

You could well be right there, she does them pretty consistently and bag on 2hr naps would then be 3 sleep cycles. L always used to wake at 1.5hr or 2:15 if he did long naps, so not unreasonable to think 1:20 and 2hr are her long naps.

Is there any pattern to these long naps happening? Dodgy night before them or anything? Just wondering if she's in a bit of a loop but its longer and we can't see it.

[labrodyk]

Yes, with the exact 2hr nap that's what made me think of it...

No, i can't find any pattern at all!! She just randomly pulls them. Then surprisingly she slept from 8pm (7.30pd) to 7.30am this morning! She was going to fall asleep again so I got her up. Our nights have been relatively short and she's been super grumpy through the day but I put that down to pushing that first A later than 3ish hrs because a couple of days she can handle it but then seems to fall apart and she'll have a meltdown and not be happy after those 1hr20 naps. Night sleep then seems to get shorter and shorter.

WU: 7.30 (woke her)
Nap 1: 10.50-12.30 (was a little unsettled at 40 minutes)
Nap 2: 3.25 into car. Didn't fall asleep until close to 4pm and that was with me driving around (and around and around), woke after 20 minutes once I stopped the car.
^^ Typical that my 4yo slept the entire drive and will now be up until 10pm!
BT: ?? Absolutely no idea. Is 7pm too late off a 20 minute nap?

^^ did wi/wo for an HOUR before she finally fell asleep at 8pm!

WU: 7.10.
Nap 1: 9.37;

Something must be wrong because again she hasn't stopped screaming all morning and just closed her eyes and collapsed in my arms at almost 9.30. I PD in bed and she was asleep in just a few minutes. She's a little snotty with a cold and i think teeth are bothering her but it's not just a little OT where I can distract, does that make sense? She's crawling all over me and crying, won't let me put her down, nuzzling into me and just all around miserable. I went to go for a walk but she screamed blue murder going into the pram so I just gave up and came back inside!
How can i EVER maintain a decent A? Unless she was awake in the early hours and then only fell asleep for 10 minutes just as I woke and checked? I don't know.

Sorry to keep posting, I just don't know who else to talk to about this

[becj86]

Its ok, happy to be a shoulder to cry on given I'm not much help routine-wise. I really am out of ideas - she's obviously either significantly affected by illness or something, yk? She could have been awake for a while in the night but how would you know? Its unrealistic to expect you'd know that.

I'm guessing when she goes to the doc, she's a perfect angel and they can't believe you're having any issues? Would it be worth keeping a food diary for her to see if there are any patterns there - she might be having gut issues with a food?