2-1 transition help with 1 year old

[Shiv52]

Lovely I'm going to be really honest and say I think it's inconsistency is the issue.  And then when you throw teeth into the issue an already inconsistent routine becomes very unstable and OT sets in. I know life has to go on but I think he does need a consistent routine.

EBT for sure so long as he tacks on and doesn't just wake 11 hours later.

You can do one nap but you need set nap and bedtime whether by A time or actual time.

If you want to do two naps then it really needs to be short an long PM and you need to be really consistent with waking after 20/30 mins so you will need to manage outings around that for a while.

I think whatever you decide you need to stick at it for 2 weeks. No changes. Commit to it and let his body clock set.

Hugs. I know you are really struggling and am sure you're exhausted.  I do think self settling may well be contributing. Can you just leave him at NWs to resettle himself?

[Shiv52]

I also want to say at this age you can't look day to day. It really is about what happened over the last several days. So last nights NW are not just related to what happened that day but what has happened the previously few days.  It may not be because he had one nap. It may well be becusee he had two two nap days followed by a one nap day and A time was just all over the place yk?

[JennVanessa1083]

Thank you for being so honest! I need that right now.

I will try my hardest to do a consistent routine. It's bad timing since I'm about to go to work PT and he will be with a nanny 3 days a week including during nap times 

I will continue with one nap days unless he wakes super early where I have no choice. I think I will try A times consistency to hopefully curb the OT. Can I do a set nap time and A time of 5 hours to bed? Or is it better to have consistency across the board? If that's the case I'll try 5 hrs A, nap, 5 hrs A.

 I think he can tack on sleep since there's so many NW wakings. Last night he did a 12.5 hr night so it is possible.

Does that sound like a good plan?

[Shiv52]

😘😘

Yes one day by A time is likely fine. With a couple of BUTS!

Too early a nap can exacerbate EW so although I'd use A times if your ideal routine is 8-nap 1-8 bed for
Example then I wouldn't do nap any earlier than 11.30 regardless of wake up.

I would set a wake up in your head and not get him up before that time regardless of waking. You can adapt nap based on one he was awake from but keep reinforcing 'it's still night time ' if it is.

And also start the day at the same time. So if wake up is 8am and he only went back to sleep at 6.30 wake him And get him up. Starting the day at the same time really helps with a A time based routine.

Seem ok??

[JennVanessa1083]

That makes sense...

I'm wondering is this normal? Bc again I have a long NW (1.5-2 hours) in the early morning. He's tired but seems to be fighting sleep. He doesn't wake up crying but tosses and turns a lot. When he is drifting somewhat he will pop his eyes open. Is this OT?!

This is 5 days in a row that this has been happening. I been doing one nap consistently for 5-6 days with the last 4 being A times of 5, nap, 4:45-5, bed.

On two nap days I get short nights but it's my fault be I let him sleep more in the day. But as soon as I do one nap I'm getting these long wakings.

I know I should be consistent but at what point do I start seeing improvement?

[Shiv52]

Hugs xx

Do me a facoir and write out your EAS for the last 5 days xx

[JennVanessa1083]

Sure!

Tuesday:

NW 10,11:15; 1:45; 4:15-6:15 am
Total 9.5

WU 8:13 am
S 1:17-2:39 pm (A 5:04)
BT 7:27 pm (A 4:47)

Wednesday:

NW 7:43-8:19; 11:53; 2:16; 3:15-4:30am
Total 10.25

WU 8:23 am
S 1:19-2:56 (A 4:56)
BT 7:57 pm (A 5:01; quietly drifted; woke quickly at 35 whimpering. Tossed and turned a lot)

Thursday:

NW 10:30; 2:16; 3:18; 5:35
Total 11

WU 7:25
S 12:51-2:33 pm (A 5:26; fighting sleep for 20 minutes)
BT 7:32 (A 4:59)

Friday:

NW 10:50; 1:34; 3:30-5 am; 7:46
Total 10.5

WU 8:20
S 1:04-2:54 pm (A 4:44; cranky and crying)
BT 7:44 pm (A 4:50; drifted easily; restless for first hour)

Yesterday

NW 11:05; 12:27; 2:30-4 am; 6:40 am
Total 10.75

WU 8:23 am
S 1:20- 3:05 pm (A 4:57)
BT 7:56 pm (A 4:51)

NW 8:45; 10:45; 1:30; 4:15-6:30 am

Up at around 8 am. Not sure how to approach the day. One nap then EBT? More mess at night? I do notice it's usually early morning. Even if I reup since its time, it takes super long for him to fall asleep. One tooth broke through, one molar is 3/4 broken through, and I'm waiting on the other 3 to fully break through.

[JennVanessa1083]

So interesting thin happened...no long NW last night. A little OT and woke up two other times to reup on meds but a much better night.

This was yesterday:

WU 8:30
S 1- 2:15 (A 4.5; cranky and crying but UT nap woke up happy)
BT 7:35 pm (A 5:20)

NW 8:30 (resettled quickly; 11:15 pm ; 3:05 am (dose)

Up at 7:30 with 11.5 hrs of sleep

Not sure what to make if it.

[zissi]

hey there, no advice re night wakings but I have noticed from your posts that you are medicating for teeth quite a bit. what are you using? I wouldn't use ibuprofen / paracetamol on a regular basis, studies have shown long term effects on heart and asthma respectively. not trying to scare you but maybe try teething gel instead if you are using pain killers. WDYT?

[JennVanessa1083]

Hey there!

I only medicate at night when he's cutting...I try teething tablets and gels but they work to a very limited degree.

I spoke to my pediatrician about it since I had the same concerns. She said as long as I'm following the dose and not medicating all day every day it should have minimal risks.

I'll definitely keep alternatives in mind.

[Shiv52]

I think you just need to keep plugging on with being consistent.   

Is there a reason you decided to do 4.5 instead of 5 hours A time?  I know I must sound like a broken record but I do think you need to decide on your set routine and try to follow it. There is a big difference between 4.5 and 5 hours when trying to set a routine.

Looking at yesterday it really could be because he'd a good long A time that he was tied enough to sleep through.

What set routine are you planning to go with?  Looking at the last few days the only thing that really stands out is that A times are varying.  If you can get a set first A then we can see how the nap length is going. And work from there. I do think you should be waking him by 8am if he's not awake.

When you give meds in the night do you just dose and let him to resettle? 

Is he going to sleep independently for nap and bedtime?

[JennVanessa1083]

He does self settle for some NW. To be honest bedtime it's a hit or miss. It's something I plan to enforce when these stinking teeth come through. But for now il being looser.

As for consistency, ok I can keep trying to be consistent. I guess I just need reassurance bc it feels like a hopeless situation.

Today my DH handled nap since I had a work meeting to attend and he totally botched it up by putting him down way late even though I urged him to be on time   

Of course he fought bedtime after having a 1:25 OT nap.

This was today:

WU 7:30 but stayed in bed until 8
S 1:15-2:30 pm
BT 7:40 pm

Thankfully I'm home for the next two days then I start work so it will be the nanny. Hoping this won't be catastrophe lol

[Shiv52]

TBH I think you need to be giving him the chance for self settling for naps and bedtime. If he's medicated as you're doing he should be fine?  I think at this age he could well be waking as we all do in light cycles of sleep and expecting you so he's not just turning over and going back to sleep Yk?  Prop issues exacerbate NWS for sure at this age even if you've a perfect routine. Is he still feeding at night or have you faded that?

Sorry about today. Hope he sleeps ok tonight. 

[JennVanessa1083]

I can definitely work on IS as much as possible. To be honest the Motrin only takes him so far in terms of pain relief; Tylenol seems to have no affect.

I do notice the long NW comes at a time where it's time for a redose. The last two nights I had the second dose ready to go which made it quicker and I guess prevented him from waking all the way up so they ended up being quick ones. This morning...I forgot and got wake ups every hour from 4-6 am. He's up at 6 so not sure whether to push through to 12:30 or try for a CN nap at around 9 then a longer nap around 1:30ish pm.

My fear is if I push too hard he will have a bad night and tomorrow I start work.

[Shiv52]

Can you do a DF of Meds before He wakes?

It's up to you hun. If you want to just wing it for a while until you get back to work then do. But tell yourself you know you're not being consistent so if things are over the place don't beat yourself up. I can't get my DD3 on a good routine because of life and her NWs are shocking. Totally shocking. But I know until I can sort her routine it's doing to be as it is. So frustrating.