June/ July 05 Mom's Chat

[CaedensMama]

Yeah Amy, Adria and Seaflower and anyone experience night sleep issues - lets put them in a room together so they are not alone or abandoned and sleep all night and check on them in the morning!

Can you tell we had a bad night?
Oh I am so exhausted. And moving for the last week and still boxes to unpack and more to pack at the other house isn't helping. There is such a difference in 2 1/2 hours and 4 hours of contineous sleep! I know Caeden is capable of this - he just likes to get up and nurse for 10 minutes and go back to sleep.

For whoever asked - teething was hard for us - it did seem to bother him mostly at night too and I have heard from others that this is pretty normal - for the teeth to really hurt more at night them day. Have you tried Tylonel or something like that?

I am thinking of just stopping nursing one feed at night - I hate to stop all cause he really does eat when I nurse - whether he needs it or not. So I am thinking that I will feed if he wakes up till about 11 and then not again till 5 and try this for a week and see if we get better sleep. DH is getting up at 5 so I don't mind a feed then and put him back to bed cause I have to get up to make lunch and coffee anyway. I am thinking I will just hold and offer the paci and let him go back to sleep w/o  nursing anytime he gets up between 11-5 (roughly). What do you all think - is it worth trying - do you think it may work?
Or am I just better off trying some other method?
BTW - we have tried PU/PD and he hates this - screams and upsets even more. Does use the paci and won't go to sleep w/o it, but typically doesn't wake just for the paci to be put back. Rarely use it at night. Just to go to sleep.

I am going to post the above question on the night wakings board to just to get some more opinions!
But - I would love to hear what you all think!

Oh - we are trying the pack and play - he is okay - I am not sure he likes the sides and it is much harder now for me to touch or pat him but he is getting more used to it - I think. I am still praying for a crib soon!

More later - we just got internet back last night!  I've  missed being on here!

[~Jency's*Momma~]

We used the paci for Jency when we were trying to get him not to eat at night.  He has slept from 8pm-3am (with out food) before so I know he can do it.  That is why I started cutting feedings.  What we did is used the pacifier for the first few nights until he got used to not eating at those times.  Then we weened from the pacifier at those times.  He got to the point that he was waking just for the pacifier (out of habit).  We just go in a pat him until he goes to sleep or until he starts screaming then we will picking him up and calm him down and once he's been calm for a few minutes we lay him down and pat his back again.

Last night he woke at 10pm screaming again (2 nights out of 3)  I still don't know why.  Then he woke at 11 out of habit.  Then he woke at 12am so I fed him (had been 4 hours).  Then he slept until 4am!!!  I fed him again then so that we would stay on routine.  Then dh got up at 5:30 and the alarm must have woke Jency but DH went in and settled him. YAE!
Then he didn't wake again until 7am which I gave him the paci and rocked him for a while and then put him back (trying to get him to get used to not really waking all the way until 7:30). He has been putting himself back to sleep when he wakes up at 6:30!!

I can't wait for a crib either.  Jency keeps gettin his head pushed up against the side of the pack n play and he doesn't like that. 
By the way someone asked what a pack n play is.  It is a play pen.

[seaflower]

CaedensMama, that is a good idea, lets leave them together for a nigth... or may be even better- leave them with one of the babies that sleep tru, hopefully s/he will teach them how it's done :lol:  :lol:  :lol:

DD is going through a growth spurt again :shock:  :?  we've just kind of managed to settle in a routine and it's all out of the window. Ah, what can you do... So back to nursing her every 2-2.5 hours! Feels as if the last two weeks were wasted!

On the good side, we stopped swaddling her and put her in a sleeping bag (grobag) and she seems to settle pretty well. Used to get out of the swaddle at the middle of the night, so now we have one problem less.

Btw, how come so many babies sleep in pack and play?? Any specific reason they are so popular? Here everybody just puts them in a cot, sometimes even straight after they are born. DD was in a moses basket for the first two months but doesn't fit in anymore

Have to go now... talk soon and hope the babies sleep tonight (here is me hoping!)

[CaedensMama]

The only reason we are using the pack and play is that is what we have till  builds him a crib. Caeden has a cradle as well - but he has outgrown it and moved around too much for me to be comfortable using it. I had him jsut on a crib mattress till he rolled over too much and off the mattress, so now I am stuck waiting on a crib...... :?
The pack and play is smaller then a crib, so for some it may be a space issue. And it is more verstile - moves around easier, folds up quick, etc.

Any others besides Adria and I that are using them for cribs?

I have put Caeden in a sleep bag too - does good during the day, but the last couple nights I have ended up swaddling as well. He usually gets one arm out, but I am hoping it will help the transition. He still sleeps better swaddled, its just getting to sleep is harder without it!

[Critter]

We had Luke in the pack 'n play in our bedroom for the first five weeks b/c it has a bassinette attachment.  We did borrow a cradle, but we had set that up in the living room with the moses basket inside of it (long story) and didn't want to move it back and forth.

Someone on the sleep forum suggested adding to Luke's feedings to see if that would get him to sleep longer at night.  I am so afraid to do that b/c I am afraid it will upset his reflux and we've just finally gotten that under control!

[CaedensMama]

Since I am breastfeeding it is hard to tell how much he is getting - tho today he went 4 hours between feeds w/o a problem and ate well when he fed - so we will see how tonight goes!

[CaedensMama]

Caeden is 5 months old today!!!!

Happy 5 month birthday to all you little ones aborn around this time!

And guess what Caeden just did...........

rolled over front to back!!!!!

He was playing happy on the floor and had rolled onto his tummy like he always does and then I was taking muffins out of the oven and when I turned back he was on his back!
Now just to wait till he realizes if he keeps turning the same direction he will actually get somewhere!!!! AHHHHHH

            

[ry,cait&alex]

Woohoo Caeden!!!!!!!  What a big boy!!!!

Well Caitie Girl rolled from tummy to back three times today!!!  She is so funny because I got all excited and was telling her what a big girl she is and she just laughs!!!! :lol:

And I think I told you guys that she had a tooth.....yeah....make that THREE TEETH :shock:  :shock:  :shock:  :shock: Dh found #3 this morning. :roll:   Good thing is that they don't seem to phase her too badly.  Thank God for small favors. :wink:

bj

[CaedensMama]

So BJ - which was Caitie's 3rd tooth? Still on the bottom or a top? Just curious which direction I ought to be watching!

Anybody else stopped swaddling recently?

We did - although I ended up seadlling last night at one to quiet him and get him back to sleep - he is doing good at naps and going to bed. I guess it's one step at a time!

[ry,cait&alex]

#1 Lower right
#2 Lower left
#3 upper right


I am convinced that she thinks this intitles her to BIG eatin' on Turkey Day.   :roll:

Ry cut his bottoms first too. 

bj

[~Jency's*Momma~]

Where is everyone?  Where has everyone been?  Did I miss something?

[~Jency's*Momma~]

Jency goes to bed at 8pm-still waking at 10:30, 12:00, 2:30, 4:00, 6:30, 7:00, & 7:30. I don't know what I'm doing wrong or how to fix it. I have been feeding him every 3 hours during the day and trying for every 4 hours at night.
Once he wakes up I play with him for 1.5 hours and then I hold him and give him the paci for 20 min and then set him in the swing to fall asleep. It all depends on how tired he is. Some times he will fall straight to sleep, other times he will just sit and stare for 10 min, other times he will fuss and fuss until he falls asleep. Not sure which is right and which means he's not really tired and which means he's overtired. Lately he has been taking 30-60 min naps and sometimes getting a 1.5 hour nap. Yesturday he only took 3-30min naps. I thought for sure he'd sleep good last night, either that or worse, but it was the same. Two night ago my sister was here and we spent alot of time out side and then he got 2 hours worth of naps and stayed up 4 hours before bed and slept from 8-12! Not sure what happened differently.
I have gotten to the point of where it is hard to stand up with out getting dizzy. I have to take excederine 3x a day now for my muscle pains and headache. I get an average of 4-5 hours of sleep a night. This has been going on for 2.5 months now! I can't get a nap because his are so short, by the time I start to fall asleep he is awake. Plus I have so much to do around here.
We finally got grass put in our back yard!!! It looks great! now we just have to get the rest of the sprinkling system hooked up and I won't have to water it or anything! I hope this time it lasts.
Paul has been wonderful despite the fact that he only gets about 4 hours of sleep and goes and works hard labor outside for 10 hours everyday. I am tempted to give Jency part of a sleeping pill for few nights just to retrain him to sleep at least one long stretch at night. He used to go 5.5 hours just fine  . I would be so happy if he would go to sleep at 8pm and then not wake until 1:30/2:00 and then 5:30 and then 8:00am!!

Any advice would be great! If you see anything I am doing wrong or what not.
I'm sorta confused because some people have told me to let him CIO (sorta, or at least let him fuss) and then other's tell me not to but then those people don't give me any alternative to help.  Also people have been telling me that a routine will help so I ask about how to get hin to nap longer and so on and so forth and then I get posts that I shouldn't be having him on a routine but then those still don't give me any advice on what 'to do.'  Please, I'm desperate.  I have had some bad thoughts about giving him up for adoption or just letting him lay in there and cry or giving him sleeping pills,  I'm desperate for DH and me to sleep.  I'm becoming a horrible wife and mother.  Always snapping and neglecting both of them.

[CaedensMama]

Hey Adria - I hear you. We are in a similar boat and though I don't have any wonderful advice - I can send big (((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))) - I know what you mean and I am there too.

I told DH one night to just leave him asleep in the car and we would go to bed - I was just kidding, but oh - for a full nights sleep!
I have been putting Caeden to nap on our bed and laying with him till he goes to sleep and depending on my mood I might sleep and may get up and get stuff done. He is going down for naps well, anywhere from 5-15 minutes and he is out. When he wakes I go right in quickly and lay back down with him and put him back to sleep, again sometimes 5 minutes sometimes 20 minutes. But he is going back to sleep 9 out of 10 times and I can get a 2 hour nap. Of course I really have to work and I am sometimes in there 2-3 times putting him back to sleep, but I am hoping that he will start sleeping thru some of his wakes and put himself back to sleep. So - overall our naps are getting better.

Nights - He is often up 5-6 times as well. I have been battling what to do, and stick with it. I think I am confusing him more by changing my mind - sometimes feed, sometimes not, sometimes rock, etc. So - my advice to both myself and you - pick what you are going to do and stick with it for 10 days. They say it takes 7-10 days to get them adjusted to a new schedule.
Last night Caedn surprised me - went down a little after 8 (I had just fed), slept till 11 and then till 3:30 - nursed and went right back to sleep and slept till 6! DH got up with him then and I slept till 7:30 - when they came in and I fed Caeden again. OH - I feel so much better today! It is amazing what 4 hours of continuous sleep will do for a body.

Hopefully there will be some other suggestions too - but hang in there - you will find something that works for all of you.

One thing that helps me too is just thinking what I would do if I lost Caeden - It would break my heart, I don't think I could stand it. So - when I am getting really frustrated with him, I remind myself I am thankful he is alive and healthly and there are alot of moms that would give anything to be up all night with their babies.

Oaky - enough rambling - I must get something done!

[Critter]

Adria, Bless your heart!  I think that we are all just in that stage right now!  I came home yesterday and cried my eyes out.  Not because Luke won't sleep, but because he STILL has snot flyin' everywhere!  Finally last night it dawned on me that we had all of our duct work replaced this summer and the AC Tech told me that it might take a year for all of this to stop.  Plus, this is just a really hard time of year for me.  My mom died ten years ago in December and I miss her now more than ever!

As for sleep tips, I wish I could help you.  Luke has always been such a good sleeper.  I have found, though, that lately I am letting him fuss just for a little while (two minutes TOPS) to see if he can figure out how to get his thumb in his mouth or his paci back in.  He wakes up once or twice in the night and we do rush right in then because I don't want him to cry so much that he wakes himself up.

Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiig hugs to everyone!

[sara_derek]

Adria - I am so sorry you are having such a hard time.  I know that none of us will fully understand your unique situation because it's happening to you, not us, but we try!  If you've been given conflicting advice here, I'm sorry.  I understand your frustration in not seeing the results you'd like right away. The thing is, Tracy makes it very clear that her methods only work with complete consistency and that you must see it through all the way. One must be very dedicated to starting as they mean to go on to have results. I would dfinitely choose one method and stick to it TOTALLY.  I would suggest pu/pd with Jency to teach him independent sleep.  In her new book she states that parents who find pu/pd to not work have usually not been given it enough time, or have not completely given up old habits. One must be 100% in their efforts to change sleep habits.

Please, I'm desperate.  I have had some bad thoughts about giving him up for adoption or just letting him lay in there and cry or giving him sleeping pills,  I'm desperate for DH and me to sleep.  I'm becoming a horrible wife and mother.  Always snapping and neglecting both of them.

I'm sure you're not serious about giving him up for adoption or giving him a sleeping pill - that those are just words from sheer exhaustion and frustration - but even telling yourself those things makes your situation worse.  Please try to focus on all of the wonderful things about Jency.  Make a plan for yourself and then follow through with it.  If you need someone to walk you through it over the phone or just to listen to you who is on the same parenting page as you, please call me!  I am more than happy to do whatever I can for you to get you out of this exhaustion and into enjoying your time with Jency and both of you getting more rest.  PM me if you are interested.  I hate to hear the desperation - I was there with my first son and I know it's so hard.  Hang in there!  Don't forget about my offer...I'm serious!