18mo taking 45mins-1hr to settle at BT-please help

[Bex09]

TBH hun if things are going that well with what you are currently doing are you not better to stick with that for now? What do you think? If you get a 6.30 wu can you try to copy the other day when that happened and you had another good night?

[*foxy*]

Hi

We've had 3 mornings where we've had a 6.30 WU, including this morning.

The first was with a 1.5 hour nap I think that was 12-1.30 (WU had been 5.30 that morning)
The second was with no nap, just quiet time
The third has been with a 1.25 nap 12.45-2

The last 2 nights we've had NW's and very unsettled nights. Last night she woke at 1.30 (briefly) 2.30-3.30 (dp got her into bed with him) and then again around 4.30. I don't know why. We either get sttn but with a 5.30 WU or NW's with a 6.30 WU. So I don't know think our routine is working yet really.

[Kay Dee]

Yay for the later wake-ups! And for the easy settling last night. That's great Definitely going in the right direction. Sorry nights are still a bit unsettled though. I agree with Bex, you need to now pick what you think is working and stick to that for a few days. What about sticking to the same as yesterday (12.45-2pm) for 3 days and after that if you feel it's still a little long then move to 1-2pm?

Or if you already think the shorter nap would be better then go straight for 1-2pm. What's your instinct?

x

[*foxy*]

Hi KayDee

I think because she's doing better at BT and she's waking a lot at night then I'll stick to the 12.45-2 nap for a few days. Do you think the NW's are routine related or something else?

[Kay Dee]

Not sure. It could be OT as she adjusts to the shorter nap, or UT if the nap is still a little too long for her. And there's always a chance it's habitual. So confusing! My guess is OT from the no nap day. I think we'll know more after a few days on the same nap. Fingers crossed it'll settle down with the new routine x

[*foxy*]

Thanks, fingers crossed here too

[clairebear79]

Hi foxy sorry been awol for a couple of days - having a rocky time here & things a bit crazy what with wedding plans etc (get married in 2 weeks!).  I see you are in good hands with Bex & Kay Dee anyway

How are things?  Do you feel the shorter nap is helping?

Things are very up & down with us & I keep wavering between whether DS needs a longer or a shorter nap.  He is most definitely UT at BT with a longer nap, leading to a short night, BUT we are getting a lot of crying NW with the shorter nap & he seems OT overall.  I think it may be a case of just riding it out but I still don't feel like I've nailed the right A time to BT.  He is chatting for ages whether his nap is long or short, or whether his A time is long or short.  Perhaps its a new developmental thing that they take longer to settle than they used to as babies/younger toddlers - IDK?!  I hope this phase passes soon!x

[*foxy*]

Hi Claire

Oh that's so exciting that your getting married in 2 weeks, I bet you never get a minute to yourself atm!

Yes, I do think the shorter nap is helping. She is still taking 30 mins to settle at BT but I think part of that is is her mind is going 100 mph and she takes a while to wind down, I'm the same so I can't blame her! She's not getting as frustrated anymore either.

GW has taken a bit of a back seat whilst we sort this routine out. She's waking at 6.30 now, well, has done for the past 3 mornings which is great.

BUT we are getting NW's. You mentioned crying NW's? DD cries out a lot and seems quite upset during the wakings. Last night she was awake 2.30-3.30 which we havent had for ages. I'm wondering if its her being OT. I'm going to stick to a 1.25 hour nap for the next few days and see how she does.

[*foxy*]

Last night was awful, just awful.

We had NW's at 9.30, 10.15, 11.15, 12. She hasn't woken before 12 in months. I got her into bed with me in the end because I hadn't slept. She just wriggled and squirmed ALL NIGHT. I had to get my dp to take over at 4.30 because I hadn't had any sleep.

I think I preferred it when she was waking at 5.30 at least she was sttn and we were getting SOME sleep. Since she's been waking at 6.30 the nights have been really bad!

Should I just stick with it? I'm exhausted
I was going to try pain meds before bed just incase and maybe go back to a 1.5 hour nap? She was tired yesterday.

[Kay Dee]

Oh no! Sounds like OT creeping in. What time was bed last night? Probably need to try and get her down earlier when capping. Sounds like a longer nap might be in order today. Could you post your EASY for yesterday?

Do you think any of it could be habitual? I wonder is it time to go back to the GW and get her used to settling independently...

Hugs x

[*foxy*]

Hi

Our easy was:

Wake 6.30
Nap 12.45-2
BT 7.30

We can try an earlier BT tonight. I thought I'd do a nap 12.30-2 today? We can start GW again, last night I helped her a bit but the nights before that she needed no help.
She hasnt woken before 12 in months so I'm not sure its habitual.

[clairebear79]

I'd say she needs to be asleep by 7pm with a nap that short hun.  We've had NW like that with the shorter nap too.  I have abandoned atm & am just going to accept a later BT/shorter night for now.

[*foxy*]

It's so tough getting it right! So do you think try a 1.5 hour nap today with a 7pm BT or as close as we can get to 7pm?

[clairebear79]

Hmmm.  I'd say with the 1h 15 nap you posted above, she needs the 7pm BT.  With a 1.5hr nap IDK.  If she is really OT then she might just surprise you & go down.

We are back on a longer nap of 1h 45 (12.45-2.30) & going for an 8pm BT & seeing what happens.  I'm not convinced its the right course of action but all the NW's with the shorter nap signal OT & he looks soooo tired out.  I always have to wake him from his nap so he obviously needs it.

[*foxy*]

She was asleep in about five minutes for her nap and napped for 1.5 hours. She seems well rested so I might see how her usual BT of 7.30 goes unless she suddenly crashes later.